Submit Poems
Get Your Premium Membership

Funny Song Poems | Funny Poems About Song

These Funny Song poems are examples of Funny poems about Song. These are the best examples of Funny Song poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

If you don't find the poem you want here, try our incredible, super duper, all-knowing, advanced poem search engine.

Details | Limerick | |

His funeral

That he planned his funeral is factual
And being a prankster quite actual
He prerecorded his voice
So when we kneeled on the joist
He said, "Hi there! Don't I look natural."

Copyright © Judith Angell Meyer | Year Posted 2008

Details | Rhyme | |

Upside Down

If the leaf wore a tree
And the ocean ate fish;
If a flower sucked the bee
And beans ate the dish;
If a beggar was chief
And a boy was a girl
A song would be brief
If a bird wore a curl.
If the grass chewed the cow
And night turned to day
I'm wondering how
Work might be play.
Wouldn't it be great
If the sun was the moon
If early was late
And a line lost its tune.
If all of these things
Were natural to do;
Then a song wouldn't sing
And teeth wouldn't chew.
              ***

Copyright © elizabeth wesley | Year Posted 2012

Details | Lyric | |

Yard Sale Cowboy On CD

From here to wherever, I'll follow a yard sale sign,
it's a past time endeavor, for my collective state of mind,
I may buy some furniture, or a trinket for a dime,
yard saling is a pleasure, yes, a personal hobby of mine,

Yea, I'm a yard sale cowboy, on the trail of search and find,
and it gives me great joy, to see a yard sale sign,
from here to wherever, cloudy days or sunshine,
I'm searching for that treasure, ain't no telling what I'll find,

I may find brand new things, boots, shoes, or clothes the right size,
silver and gold chains or rings, or an antique will catch my eyes,
I could find my brother a nice bass lure, or a spool of fishing line,
or maybe a nice piece of furniture, or something for a friend of mine,

Yea, I'm a yard sale cowboy, on the trail of search and find,
and it gives me great joy, to see a yard sale sign,
It's a past time endeavor, for my collective state of mind,
Yard saling is a pleasure, ain't no telling what I"ll find,

Yea, I'm a yard sale cowboy, I just spotted a yard sale sign,
searching is a pleasuree, ain't no telling what I'll find,
I may find an old bass lure, or a spool of fishing line,
now one thing is for sure, I just found my cat a ball of twine,
and look here, I found my ol' dog a bone to grind,

Yea, I'm a yard sale cowboy, on the trail of search and find,
I may find an old bass lure, or a spool of fishing line,
from here to wherever, cloudy days or sunshsine,
I'm a yard sale cowboy, on the trail of search and find,
Yea, I'm a yard sale cowboy, ain't no telling what I'll find,

Hey Bud, how much for that there what-cha-ma-call-it?
Naw Naw, Naw, that there thing-a-ma-jig, there next to that do-ma-flitchie,
Yea, Yea, that thinga-ma-jig right there.....ya say three dollars..um-m-m..OK...
I'll take it...here ya go.....and how much for that do-daddy over there?
Yea, yea, right next to those 2 onion skin tires...Uh Huh..yea..well I'll be..
Well yea..I'll take it too...it's something I just can't live without...ha ha ha..

Copyright © Lawrence Ingle | Year Posted 2009

Details | Lyric | |

Oh Uhura - To Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah

There was a Starship Enterprise,
It was the ruler of the skies,
But you don't really care for sci-fi, do you?
With Captain Kirk
And Mr Spock
And don’t forget the trademark jock,
And there upon the bridge you’ll find Uhura

Oh Uhura, Oh Uhura 
Oh Uhura, Oh Uhura

You’ll find Bones Macoy down in sickbay,
“I’m a doctor Jim” he’d say,
And cure whatever space bug ran through you,
He’ll banish away every cough,
Even if your name’s Chekov,
Or perhaps you might be sweet Uhura

Oh Uhura, Oh Uhura
Oh Uhura, Oh Uhura

To make the starship up and go,
The man you really need to know,
Is the Helm officer called Sulu,
But if it’s a message you’d like to send,
Then of course you can depend,
Upon the talented Miss Uhura,

Oh Uhura, Oh Uhura
Oh Uhura, Oh Uhura

Your voyage lasted three short years
But despite the trekkie’s fears,
It wouldn’t be the last time that we’d view you,
Of feature films there’d be twelve,
Before the franchise they would shelve,
But we won’t forget you dear Uhura

Oh Uhura, Oh Uhura
Oh Uhura, Oh Uhura
Oh Uhura, Oh Uhura
Oh Uhura, Oh Uhura

Oh Uhura

Copyright © Sharon Smith | Year Posted 2013

Details | Lyric | |

Northern Suburbia

Your love is real 
the love you feel.
Your love is great 
the love you make.
Your records are on fire 
its your desire.
Take me out tonight
and go wild and crazy, 
or be fat and lazy. 
So I played some Doors 
and saw some whores. 
So I said goodbye 
and they all must die, fool. 
So dig my guts 
and eat my brain 
and then go insane. 
I don't
Care I love it 
so forget it, Punk!

Copyright © Blake Holland | Year Posted 2015

Details | Lyric | |

The Christmas Song -Of Woe-

Who is knocking on my door tonight?
Debt collectors!  Those thugs that we'll ignore
Yuletide woes being sung by my spouse
While we've drawn the shades, and doused the lights!

Everyone knows a turkey and some mistletoe
Would help to make the season bright
But we'll be eating beans,    'cause our pocketbooks are lean
Oh!   We're out of Tums!!......The house could blow tonight !!!

They say that Santa's on his way
But our petty cash won't jingle much today
So this mother hen is going to cry
Because her hungry chicks won't have an egg to fry!

And so, I'm offering this simple phrase....
To folks from one to ninety two
Although the recession....is behind our depression...
Merry Christmas, ....Boo Hoo !


..........................................................................................................
(Lyrics written to the tune "The Christmas Song" )(written by Mel Torme)
___________________________________
12/17/15
For Tammy Ream's Contest: "Who Is Knocking On MY Door?" 

Copyright © Carrie Richards | Year Posted 2015

Details | Lyric | |

The Blocking Game

with words that burned right through my soul he told me we were through
he said that I was out of place and now I'm oh so blue
this prison he's consigned me to is colder than Quebec
oh how I wish to end this pain - he told me go to heck! (GASP)

and then he shouted:

I'm blocking you I'm blocking you 
so all the world will know
I'm blocking you I'm blocking you
you ain't my friend no mo'
I'm blocking you I'm blocking you 
for everyone to see
I'm blocking you I'm blocking you
for all eternity

so there I sat with eyes agog as sentence was imposed
got on my knees and begged him but the sign said he was closed
where will I go what will I do now that he's turned me off
well here I go I'm wishing him one great big mazel tov (MAZEL TOV!)

then he shrieked:

I'm blocking you I'm blocking you
so all the world will know
I'm blocking you I'm blocking
you ain't my friend no mo'
I'm blocking you I'm blocking you
for everyone to see
I'm blocking you I'm blocking you 
for all eternity

everybody now:

he's blocking me he's blocking me
he wants the world to know
he's blocking me he's blocking me
I ain't his friend no mo'
he's blocking me he's blocking me
so everyone will see
he's blocking me he's blocking me 
for all eternity

for all eternity...

thas right

Copyright © The Seeker | Year Posted 2016

Details | Lyric | |

Poetry Soup Blues

Well...
they're fightin' over here
and mud-slingin' over there
their angsty blogs are ever on display

man, if only they could see
what their spats have done to me
my nerves were once all bundled now they're frayed

(chorus)

doctor doctor give me the news, I've got the-
godforsaken
bellyachin'
heart a'breakin'
body shakin'
Poetry Soup blues

Well...
she's blocked me over here
and he's shunned me over there
I'm just a simple poet (ask my mom)

dangit, can't they understand
things ain't goin' like I planned
I really thought my poems were da bomb

(yee haw)

doctor doctor give me the news, I've got the-
godforsaken
bellyachin'
heart a'breakin'
body shakin'
Poetry Soup blues

(Bridge)

now admins are on my case
seems my jokes are out of place
I really feel the final end is near
oh if only they could see
that the jokes were all on me
why can't we just sit down and have a beer

oh doctor doctor give me the news, I've got the-
godforsaken
bellyachin'
heart a'breakin'
body shakin' 
Poetry Soup blues

(one more time)

his doctor doctor gave him the news, he's got the-
godforsaken
belly's achin'
heart's a'breakin'
body's shakin'
head's a spinnin'
nerves a'tremblin'
Costa Rican 
(Costa Rican?)
Poetry Soup blues

thas right

Copyright © The Seeker | Year Posted 2016

Details | Verse | |

Invisible Ladies

Invisible ladies! You see them ev’rywhere,
In sensible raincoats and Margaret Thatcher hair.
Standing at bus-stops, watching the bus go by:
Waiting at crossings,
Letting the traffic splatter mud in their eyes …

Invisible ladies, all in their “middle years”.
Invisible ladies:
No hopes, but so many fears …

   SO polite! So ladylike!
   Just don’t mind us, don’t make a fuss … Wouldn’t be right …
   But deep inside, there’s such a rage …
   You’ll catch it too, this vanishing plague
   Called MIDDLE AGE!

Invisible ladies … shopping bags all akimbo:
Moving like zombies, each in her private limbo.
Pushing a trolley at ASDA or Sainsbury:
Examining prices,
Searching for bargains – ever more desp’rately …

Invisible ladies, choosing the longest queue …
The one with the baby:
Babies, they’re visible to …

   SO polite! So ladylike!
   Just don’t mind us, don’t make a fuss … Wouldn’t be right …
   But deep inside, there’s such a rage …
   You’ll catch it too, this vanishing plague
   Called MIDDLE AGE!
	
Invisible ladies! When somebody barges by,
Instead of complaining, they always apologise!
They oughta get angry, and maybe get pushy too:
Say, “HEY! Look AT me!
See, I’m a PERSON, really very like you!”

Invisible ladies, everyone knows one …
They live in our houses …
You probably call yours “MUM!”





(This is an anthem for all fifty-somethings - Chaps too!)


Copyright © Frances King | Year Posted 2009

Details | Light Poetry | |

' El Toro - Rojo '

Como’ Si’ Yama’, Senor’
Como’ Si Yama’, Por Favor’…
… for Below That Embroidered Sombrero’
Shone Eyes Like El Dorado

He Was A Tall and Handsome Hombre’
Like The Range of Sierra Madre’
…Now, He Sat Center The Cantina
Surrounded by Bonita – Senhoritas

He Smiled, “Buenos-Dias Senora’”
Por Favor, Por Que’ El-Hora’ ?...
If So, Have A Seat, Mi- Amiga’
And Mercedes, Bring Over More Cerveza

He Was… Rodrigo Reyes-Pacheco’
Best - of The West, of Vaqueros’
He Came to Compete in The Rodeos
And Win Fame and Fortune in Pesos’

He Came Thru El Paso De’ Tejas
Thru Dusty Rancheros and Mesas
To Ride on El Toro Rojo
Who Has Never Been Ridden Befo’…

La Viva’… Arriva’  … Rodrigo
The Brave and The Bold Caballero’
Champion Bull Rider, from Old Mexico
Vaya’… Con Dios’ !... Rodrigo

Now, El Toro Rojo, Was Dangerous
For Killing Men, El Rojo, Was Infamous
His Horns Had Pierced Many A Corazon
Ripped Flesh, Like It Was Piñata’ Hung

I Informed All of This To Rodrigo
The Hombre, Was Bent on Being Macho’…
… He Would Ride Toro Rojo, Manyana’
Said “Gracias”… But My Cares Were Por Nada’ !

La Viva’… Arriva’… Rodrigo
The Brave and The Bold Caballero’
Champion Bull Rider, from Old Mexico
Vaya’… Con Dios’!... Rodrigo

… Now, He Wasn’t Loco in La Cabeza’
I Just Didn’t Comprehende’ … “Que’ Pasa”
But I Saw Rodrigo Atop… El Rojo 
… ! He Rode Like A Latino – Tornado ! …

He Rode El Rojo, To The End…
Then, Turned ‘Round and Rode Him Again…
Rodrigo had Won… Just Like He Planned…
Because El Toro – Rojo …   …  Was Mexican !

La’ Viva’ … Arriva’ … Rodrigo
The Brave and The Bold Caballero
Champion Bull Rider from Old Mexico
Vaya’ … Con Dios ! … Rodrigo….
Vaya’ … Con Dios !... Rodrigo o o o o o


for Ruben Ortellao... 
I Don't Really Know 
What Your Branch of Humanity is... 
(Spanish, French or Other)
But I thought You Might Like 
This Whimsical Poem...  
Oh... And Thank You For Your 
Most Generous Comments... 
(Cause I Know You Are A Fantastic Poet... 
I've Read Several of Yours 
and I Love Them Too...)

 (P.S.  Excuse the Spelling... 
I'm Spanish Illiterate (Smile)
MoonBee

Copyright © MoonBee Canady | Year Posted 2009

Details | Blank verse | |

Love Song

Here’s what I’m thinking now 
at the end of the world: 

There are no atheists in foxholes— 
no theists in politics. 
If knowledge is power, 
and power corrupts, 
then why did I bother reading you, Cicero? 

Does it matter that I didn't’t love you? 
Would it have mattered if I did? 

There’s a poetry reading tonight 
whence I’I'll chide other poets 
who don’t sit alone. 
I won’t bring up death 
but I might have to breathe, 
even into a mike 
and mouth lines to get a snap or a boo 
maybe even a wince or two. 

Just maybe I’I'll talk about love 
and how following your heart is like following a dog— 
it only leads to vittles and (female dogs). 
But how many times have I used that line 
since the story I wrote about you, 
a witty and sexy and fictional you? 
Most likely I’I'll read something tonight about you. 

I won’t recite it from memory 
because I don’t think about you that much anymore, 
not even when I search for my socks in your drawer 
or when I put on the scratchy sweaters you give me, 
horizontally striped to bring out my eyes? 

I don’t remember your eyes 
except they are blue. 
And I don’t remember you, 
not even when I smell cucumber and apple, 
not even when I sleep on my side of the bed 
or when you walk through the door 
happy to see me; 
even then I don’t remember you. 
Does it matter that I don’t love you? 
Would it have mattered if I did? 

How about a few one-liners 
for the end of days?— 

Depression is self-awareness, 
which you’d know if you were; 
I need Ritalin to listen to you, 
Lithium to hug you, 
Viagra to feel you, 
and Valium to sleep. 

All you need 
is me standing there, waiting at home 
with turns of phrase and word plays 
telling you about why I hate Ayn Rand 
but want to buy as much as I can 
and how I love celebrity gossip 
and detest poetry slams 
and find rhyming trite 
except when I am. 

Hypocrites can still be right, 
which you do understand 
because you nod at my nonsense 
about fighting the man. 

But now, at the end of all things— 
I’m speechless and witless and pointlessly well-read, 
and you’re just sitting there, smiling 
asking me to pass the bread.

Copyright © Nick Hertzog | Year Posted 2010

Details | Lyric | |

A Piece Of Lace

[Verse-1]
I watched you walk by yesterday, and yes again you turned and looked away
You never give me the time of day, and you're always looking sad and grey
A small piece of lace from your pink dress, is all that's left of you and me
Wish I could take back yesterday, when I went astray and set you free
I wish I could find the words to say, instead of making you look away
Oh! It's funny how a little piece of lace, makes me yearn for your embrace

[Verse-2]
I know that I still need your love, because my heart is always feeling blue
And I guess I'll never be the same, for playing around and being untrue
You gotta know this isn't what I wanted, cause now I'm always on my knees
But I can see how you like your freedom, of being with him and not with me
But baby a twist of fate's what tore us apart, and placed this look upon my face
Oh! it's still funny how a little piece of lace, makes me yearn for your embrace

[Chorus]
A piece of lace from your pink dress, keeps putting me down won't let me rest
And these cloudy skies are back today, holding my heart and soul at bay
I pray you come and take this lace, and wipe these tears from my face
Oh! It's funny how a little piece of lace, makes me yearn for your embrace

[Verse-3]
All those things that you used to do, is what made me fall in love with you
You gave me your all once upon a time, but like a fool I up and flew
And the things I went and said that day, made you fade and drift away
I never shoulda treated you that way, cause baby I need you here today
The sun keeps hiding behind the clouds, and all I do is sit and cry
And this piece of lace holds my heart at bay, I don't know...maybe it's a sign

[Chorus]
A piece of lace from your pink dress, keeps putting me down won't let me rest
And these cloudy skies are back today, holding my heart and soul at bay
I pray you come and take this lace, and wipe these tears from my face
Oh! It's funny how a little piece of lace, makes me yearn for your embrace

Oh! It's funny how a little piece of lace, makes me yearn for your embrace

Copyright © George Martin | Year Posted 2007

Details | Lyric | |

Like a Poet

I made it on the bestest list (wait! is that a real word?)
Somehow I reached the top (pronounce top like toop please)
Didn't know how good I was
Until I found the soup

I was down
Wore a frown
I'd been blocked and often mocked
But you made me see
Yeah, you made me see
My poems rock!

Whee, like a poet
Read for the very first time
Like a poet
My words blead for you (did I spell blead right?)
Plus they rhyme 

Gonna give this all I got, man
Throwing caution to the wind
Been saving myself for you guys
Ima poetry vir-gin (does that feel forced? idk)

I'm a bard
Wirked so hard
Spent some dough and got self-pubbed
Oh, but here I am
Yeah, who's da man
I write 'em all unplugged (scratching head)

Whee, like a poet
Read for the very first time
Like a poet
My words blead for you
Plus they rhyme

woah
woah, oh
woah

I was down
I wore a frown
Banned last year
They called me a clown
But daddy's back home
With his big chrome dome
I've nothing to lose

Whee, like a poet
Read for the very first time
Like a poet
My words blead for you
Plus they rhyme

Like a poet, yip yip
Like a poet
Feels so good to rite
Muse is knockin'
Gotta go now
(You like me, you really like me)

Woah woah hugs hugs ooh ooh
Syber hugs for everyone 
Xozzooxzo (dang! forgot the pattern)

Yip yip yippee 











Copyright © The Seeker | Year Posted 2016

Details | Lyric | |

You Won't Tell Them How You Lied

[verse-1]
Tonight it feels like, the end of the world
Tonight you showed me, you were never my girl
I wonder do you know, what my heart is doing
Well girl it's breaking in two, since you've gone

[verse-2]
Go ahead tell those lies, to all your friends
Go ahead tell them, what a big fool i've been
I wonder will you tell them, you have a heart of stone
Or will you call them, and joke about me on the phone

[chorus]
Well be sure to tell them, how you broke my heart
And how funny it was, when I set down and cried
Tell them how, you tore my world apart
'Cause I know, you won't tell them how you lied

[verse-3]
You're gonna have to be careful, when you're drinking
You're gonna have to be sober, when you're bragging
You'll have to learn to shut your mouth, when your wasted
Or everyone will no your a liar, and how your mind is twisted

[chorus]
Well be sure you tell them, how you broke my heart
And how funny it was, when I set down and cried
And tell them how, you tore my world apart
'Cause girl I know, you won't tell them how you lied

Copyright © George Martin | Year Posted 2007

Details | Verse | |

Ding Dong The Wicked Witch is Dead

Globally, miners jubilantly jump for joy
Smiles on the faces of every girl and boy
The grins of a newly opened Xmas toy
Thatcher’s dead.

Trade unionists bounce along the street
Music blaring and the tapping of feet
From nurses to Bobbies still on the beat
Thatcher’s dead.

Street parties announced in the nation
Satan who brought economic inflation
Is deceased, now’s the time for elation
Thatcher’s dead.

Its times like this I’m sad I’m an atheist
And can only shout and wave my fist
And then go to the pub and get pissed
Thatcher’s dead.

Copyright © Dan Keir | Year Posted 2013

Details | Light Poetry | |

Song of the Used Car Salesman

“Hello, hello Good Morning!” The salesman says, (though it’s actually late 
afternoon.)

(We can’t have them rushing off,) he thinks, (when I have cars to move!)

“See this little beauty…” (The side I’m leaning on anyway!)

“I’ve so many interested buyers, I’m sure, this car will sell today!”

The salesman sizes up the couple who clearly like the car.

“Zero to sixty in nothing flat!” (Though you may not get that far!)

“Previous owner? Took fine care.” (To wreck the interior in the rear!)

“Runs so smooth, purrs like a cat.” (But sticks when changing gears.)

The well learned smile, the soothing voice, the salesman sees his chance.

“Let’s step inside, we’ll work it out, my dears you can always finance!”

(The hidden costs, no don’t mind those, just the way it’s done.)

“Sure come on in, have a seat, this is when it becomes fun!”

As usual the costs are more than they think they can afford.

(Of course if we didn’t start out doubled, we salesmen would get bored!)

“Now look here it’s just a bit more, I know just how you feel.

With a car like this, I’m the one who loses. Believe me this is a great deal!”

(Yes indeed I lose this bucket of bolts I’ve had to push.

Never mind the oil leak, or the tires have turned to moosh.)

 “Well… because you seem so nice I’ll take this much off too.”

(There they are the happy smiles, too bad the jokes on you!)

The salesman he waves goodbye as the car drives off the lot.

Another couple, a little wide eyed, sees the new car in its spot.

“Hello, hello! Good afternoon!”(Sunset reflecting off of the wheel.)

“I’ve another buyer for this one but… you look nice, let’s make a deal!”

Copyright © A. Sanders | Year Posted 2007

Details | I do not know? | |

The break up- Footle contest

Cold stares
heart tares

Copyright © Heather Hill | Year Posted 2010

Details | Rhyme | |

Gummy Worms

Gummy Worms

Everybody likes me.
Nobody hates me.
Because I share my worms –
Yummy, yummy gummy worms
Sour and sweet yummy worms
Sitting in my kitchen, sharing worms!

(SHOUT!)
Yummy, yummy gummy worms!

Collaboration by Dane Smith-Johnsen and her 6 year old grandson
Inspired by the Childhood song, “Sittin’ in the Garden eatin’ Worms”
June 13, 2010

Copyright © Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen | Year Posted 2010

Details | Quatrain | |

Sarong Song

For breakfast I sat down with sweetened cocoa,
then snacked on Hershey kisses all day long.
A chocolate cream éclair I had with dinner.
I’m changing my bikini for sarong.

May 9, 2011 for Eve Roper's New or Old 3 Poetry Contest
 (Quatrain form must rhyme lines 2 and 4 and have similar syllable count)





Copyright © Andrea Dietrich | Year Posted 2011

Details | Free verse | |

Could this be a RAP

I thought I would do a Rhyme in Rap.
Even though I find that kind of music Crap.
I am just a normal type of guy.
I wont forever ever lie.
Because that's not who I am.
I am a one woman man.
I have brown hair and deep blue eyes.
What you get with me is the beauty inside.
I wont hide my life from you I will tell only the truth.
I love all life all animals especially cats.
I don't go to a gym but I walk to stay healthy.
I may not be rich but in love I am wealthy.
What you see isn't what you get.
Because I am so much better than that.
I will rock your world because a boat is small..
While some may give you some?
I will always give you my all.
Life will be so much fun.
your back will never be against a wall.
For you my love I will always be on the ball.
You always take my breath away.
Make my heart pound faster.
Your the only one. I will always run after.
You are the goddess the queen of my life.
Maybe that's why so many men want you as a wife.
Your kisses are like heaven.
You are an angel without wings.
God made you to be all of the things.
That men want to cherish to honour to love.

Copyright © Keith Teaser | Year Posted 2016

Details | Lyric | |

Viagra and Beer

Too much Viagra and beer.
Too much Viagra and beer.
My wife was out of town,
I hit every club around.
Each time I'd hope to find
A horny woman here.

Country Bob's was the last club that was open.
Near blind drunk and horny, but I was still hopin'.
A pretty woman gave me a glance,
Smiled and said, "Nice pants.
Honey, I'm ridin' if you're ropin'."

A few hours later, I was in a Helluva mess
She's still ridin' hard and screamin', "God, this is the best!"
I was dizzy and light-headed. I had pains in my chest,
But she wouldn't stop long enough to call EMS.

When I came to, I was home in my own bed,
Next to my lovely wife; and this is what she said:
"I picked you up at Country Bob's, my dear;
And there's gonna be some changes around here.

You were fantastic last night;
So, I only think its right
If I supplement your diet 
With Viagra and beer."

Viagra and beer. Viagra and beer.
She treats me like a king,
Says I make her body sing;
So, She makes sure I get my Viagra and beer.

Viagra and beer. Viagra and beer.
Yeah, she makes sure I get my Viagra and beer.

We're like newlyweds. 
I need a break sometime.

Submitted by: Buzz O'Words
Written: 3/3/14

Copyright © Robert Candler | Year Posted 2014

Details | Lyric | |

Country Boy, City Slicker On CD

Well, I moved into town to live like a city slicker,
Loaded my truck, found a place, and here I am,
Though a country boy has a head a bit thicker,
City life is not so hard to understand,

And I've been learnin' how to use a computor,
How to do some picture takin' with a cell phone,
How to get insurance for my truck and motor scooter,
But city life is nothing like back home,

Because where I come from, they call it the boonies,
Dirt roads, back woods, life as country as can be,
Though now I'm mixed in with all the town loonies,
They'll never take the country out of me,

Yea, I can still plant me a nice little garden,
Though not nearly as big as it use to be,
And still listen to country music, Dolly Parton,
She's on my coffee mug for all to see,

And I still get to do some dear huntin'
For those split tails runnin' 'round here,
And I make sure to keep my truck tuned and runnin'
By way of Auto Zone, or I'd run out of beer,

Yea, I livin' in the hood, straight from the boonies,
It's great be an American and free,
Though I'm mixed in good with all the town loonies,
They'll never take the country out of me,

Yea, I moved into town to live like a city slicker,
And I'm doin' the best that I can...
I can drive by Churchill Downs and hear the horses nicker,
I'm just a country boy with a city slicker plan,
I can drive by Churchill Downs and hear the horses nicker,
I'm still a country boy, yea, that's who I am,
Though a country boy has a head a bit thicker,
City life is not so hard to understand.

Copyright © Lawrence Ingle | Year Posted 2008

Details | Lyric | |

The Wine Song

Chianti, Riesling, Chardonnay;
What kinda wine we gonna have today?
Pass that bottle, if you please -
I think I'll have a little more Chablis!

Swirl that stuff 'round in the glass...
Show 'em all that you got class!
Has it got the nose? Has it got the look?
Can you use it when you cook?

     Wine, Wine, Wine
     All hail the Grape Divine!
     Wine, Wine, Wine
     Makes everyone feel fine!
     You got yours, and I got mine -
     Wine, Wine, Wine, Wine, Wine!

Sniff that bouquet up yer nose;
"What's the Year, d'you suppose?"
Could be red, or could be white -
Either way, we're havin' wine tonight!

Truckin' on down to da liquor store;
Runnin' out - gotta get some more!
The folks at the counters all know my face -
I practically live down at the place!

     Wine, Wine, Wine
     All hail the Grape Divine!
     Wine, Wine, Wine
     Makes everyone feel fine!
     You got yours, and I got mine -
     Wine, Wine, Wine, Wine, Wine!

Tokay, Shiraz, Pinot Noir!
I ain't never seen so many wines before!
Step right up and take a little taste -
I ain't gonna let a single drop go to waste!

     Wine, Wine, Wine
     All hail the Grape Divine!
     Wine, Wine, Wine
     Makes everyone feel fine!
     You got yours, and I got mine -
     Wine, Wine, Wine, Wine, Wine!




Copyright © William Masonis | Year Posted 2011

Details | Light Poetry | |

Mermaid Song

The Mermaid  Songs



Once upon a time, as school was coming to it’s yearly close.
We’d read about mermaids and their songs of Golden prose.
Now, the witch was over visiting and heard everybody’s sighs.
They so, wanted to sing with mermaids, and thru the waters glide.

Dragon was the worst, as he grabbed my mop top to become his hair.
Then he flew out to the lake dock, and began calling those ladies fair.
I began thinking how sad, if my Dragon never did meet this ladylove.
The witch, tears upon her face, then brought that, which he dreamt of.

It seems, while on her yearly travels, our witch once met a lovely mere.
Who was fascinated with the tales of Dragon, and the antics he did stir.
Suddenly, they were there together, a wish granted on a witch’s whim.
Dragon became so very quiet, as a first blush of shyness, ran over him.

The mermaid laughed and giggled as she took the mop from off, his head.
Then she sang a soulful song as she began to touch his wings and said...
Where I come from you’re a legend, a story of days, from, long, gone bye.
To this he just smiled. Yes, our Dragon had turned smitten, and so very shy.

It lasted only a moment; until she asked him, to please, take her to the sky. 
Two dreams became one as they traveled the skies, and then the water nigh.
She also, met Dragons penguins, the first she had ever been able to meet.
Them from cold, and she from hot…now in the middle all were complete.

Suddenly the mermaid had the idea, to bring in more of her mere folk.
What? You thought they only sat, singing and giving their hair a stroke?
We invited the neighboring swim teams, accapella groups, and families.
And don’t forget the Glee Clubs, plus the Barber Shop Quartets, you see.

Actually, everybody came to do, even barbecues for Dragon and his guests.
Once a week all summer, the fun continued, but never the same, not once.
It was a summer to be made into legends, for all our days and those beyond.
And each time, we honored the witch, who’d let us learn the Mermaids songs.

Copyright © Carol Eastman | Year Posted 2014

Details | Limerick | |

CLIP IT ON

Clip it on and don't think twice
Clip it on cuz it looks nice.
Clip it on so you know where it is at.
Clip it on maybe to a hat.
Clip it on so it does not fall off.
Clip it on so your pet don't runaway.
Clip it on so it stays in place.
Clip it on in outer space.
Clip it on every day.
Clip it on around the world.
JUST CLIP IT ON.

Copyright © craig schaber | Year Posted 2011

Details | Limerick | |

The Monster Mash

<                              dancing to the hit song monster mash
                                frankenstein and werewolf got real smashed
                                took the witches culdeen
                                and boiled up mummys spleen
                                Quasimodo joined in on the bash


                                witches brew of brains spleens gizzards hearts
                                illuminates party from it's start
                                Dracula and zombies
                                lurking for free bodies
                                poor old frankie's wife just fell apart 



                               the bewitching dance came to its end
                               when bats flew in frenzy around den 
                               on this all hallows eve
                               trickery was up sleeve
                               sent my 3 black cats in to defend

Copyright © Katherine Stella | Year Posted 2010

Details | Lyric | |

PIRATE PUB SONG

SUNG TO THE TUNE OF "LONDON BRIDGE IS FALLING DOWN"

Wobbly-boot ter rubbity-dub
nary me ol' hide did scrub
showin' crack
'n grinder plaque
th' pirate's shorin' 

Hail th' buccaneerin' frog
tip th' keg 'n swill me grog
a blunt o' pot, 
a wench's bot
fer all-night whorin'

Th' briny whore, th' scurvy wench
wit' bloomers off 'n stinky stench
fer ha'penny's worth
did warm me berth
'n rolled off snorin'

Hail th' buccaneerin' frog
tip th' keg 'n swill me grog
a blunt o' pot, 
a wench's bot
fer all-night whorin'

Up th' hips 'n spread th' knees
tig ol' bitties pump 'n squeeze
roll th' rump
hump-hump-hump-hump
a-rippin' 'n roarin'

Hail th' buccaneerin' frog
tip th' keg 'n swill me grog
a blunt o' pot, 
a wench's bot
fer all-night whorin'





Copyright © delysia hendricks | Year Posted 2013

Details | Lyric | |

My Sheep (Parody of the Beatles' "She Loves You")

My sheep go “Baa, Baa, Baa”
My sheep go “Baa, Baa, Baa”
My sheep go “Baa, Baa, Baa, Baa, Baa”

Farm country’s quite a place
Greener space and friendly smiles
My sheepdog likes to chase
Grazing flocks out here for miles

You know without sheep,
Don’t ya know I would be sad
Yeah without sheep,
I would go stark raving mad 

My sheep go “Baa, Baa, Baa”
My sheep go “Baa, Baa, Baa”
And with a woolly friend, your life is never bad

They call me Miss BoPeep
I guess it’s sorta fair
Because my spoiled sheep
Get tender loving care

You know without sheep,
Don’t ya know I would be sad
Yeah without sheep,
I would go stark raving mad, ooh!

My sheep go “Baa, Baa, Baa”
My sheep go “Baa, Baa, Baa”
And with a woolly friend, your life is never bad

So you can spread the word
My stock stick waives with pride
Noisy faithful herds
Are always by my side

You know without sheep,
Don’t ya know I would be sad
Yeah without sheep,
I would go stark raving mad, ooh!

My sheep go “Baa, Baa, Baa”
My sheep go “Baa, Baa, Baa”
And with a woolly friend, your life is never bad
With a woolly friend, your life is never bad
With a woolly friend, your life is never...
Bad!
"Baa, Baa, Baa"
"Baa, Baa, Baa, Baaaaaa"

Copyright © Michele Nold-Godleske | Year Posted 2010

Details | Rhyme | |

Froggy Love Song

A young green frog
Strumming on a log,
His warbling sounds
Singing words of love.

Strumming and a crooning
He warbled long,
About the moon and the stars,
In his lovebird song.

He also sung about
His wetlands home,
Singing and a plucking
On his swampy roam.

Taken in by the sounds
Of this sweet melody,
Another green frog,
Swaying in her tree.

Love arrows bounced
Between the two,
The pounding of their hearts
Just grew and grew.

Now they sit together
On a large lily pad,
He now sings songs,
About being a dad.

Copyright © john williams | Year Posted 2015

Details | Haiku | |

Spanish Gypsy

Guitars seduce me
With stacatto semi-tones
Spanish Gypsy scales

Copyright © Mark J. Halliday | Year Posted 2014