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Death Pain Poems | Death Poems About Pain

These Death Pain poems are examples of Death poems about Pain. These are the best examples of Death Pain poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Free verse | |

A Wish -re-post-

A WISH -- In Memory Of 

"I Wish"

I wish I could blow air into your little lungs, 
The day my daughter brought your stillborn body into this world. 
Hold your little body warm, 
And tell my little girl you have her cute little nose....
Count your little fingers, and kiss your little toes....

I wish, 
I could look into your daring eyes, 
Facing a little boy, who's ready for this world
I wish,
I could tell my daughter you have her beautiful brown eyes...
Sadly, it’s not like that.
How can I tell my daughter everything will be all right?
When a piece of my heart was stolen with her's,
When giving birth to her son, my grandson 
March 25, 2013---- How it Hurts! 
~~~
O’ how I wish, you entered this world crying
Instead, we're the ones left in tears of sorrow
~~~
How I wish you could be, 
And not this feeling you left inside
How I wish, God could explain why o' why o' why?

Mostly, I WISH grandma could fix this and make 
your mommy feel, the joy she was robbed of.

In memory of my grandson: ---Bael Lesley G.
Born March 25, 2013  ---   RIP March 25, 2013

----------
by;PD  :-(


Details | Tanka | |

Tanka Tears

You had lots of fun
At the local where drinks flowed.
Night took you away...
One last breath in mangled wreck;
My heart aches. Why can’t I cry?

-------------------------------------
Contest: Tanka Tears
Sponsor: Rick Parise
Chosen POTD ~ 14th Feb 2015


Details | Free verse | |

That Day, A Life Crushed

That Day, Life Crushed



I was resting on a lake dock that was in deep decay
it ran fifty yards out into the seamless water
that day my baby brother had went to swim with his friends
a normal summer day that shone with splendor
and peaceful was the soft blowing wind
only fate was awake and moving ever foward


there I was in peaceful solitude , resting
gazing at the lapping waves as they spoke
ignorant of what had taken place only moments before
the passing of a young and promising life, my brother


sun still beamed, wind still blew and life changed
a truck came racing across the bridge
I saw my best friend waving at me franticly
then I heard, I knew tragedy had befallen somebody
somebody I loved dearly


Moments later, the force of truth crushed me into a ball
it was as I feared, a death, an unimaginable horror
my baby brother was dead, my fourteen year old baby brother 
gone, gone , gone!


Electric current had destroyed his life
destroyed my life, sent me into a seven year rage
I said my goodbyes in a quiet rage and vowed that God, 
God would pay for this!
And so it began a terrible journey into a dark abyss 
one that consumed and slowly ate my soul
my soul it ate with relish and glee


I became a punisher of God!
Yes, such misery did I heap out by the bucket
by the ton and ate it's glory until-

Seven years later, light came into me as I slept
I woke one morning to find that the one punished was ME!
God had told me but I refused to hear
Now I heard and that truth crushed me again!


The road back took time but seven long years was over!
life returned, joy returned!
Majestic love returned to reclaim it's treasure-- my soul!


My soul rejoices to this day,
this day I see God stayed with me as I ran away!

I, he that runs no MORE!

Robert J. Lindley 06-30-2014

My first ever write about my brother, Billy Joe Lindley
fourteen year old and the girls adored him,
that summer electrocuted by a faulty electric pump at a 
friend's house by the river. 
1976, I think about him every day since, he was an angel compared 
to me and why, why did I live!


Details | Free verse | |

over and over agin

sometimes i talk to myself, 
my mind is racing,
i dont know what to do...
so hard to explain.
depression isn't a stage
or a faze some kids go through
it shatters you...
i saw it all. 
she cried silent in her bed,
blood stains covered her favorite jeans,
her every shirt,
long sleeve ofcourse...
she suffered through it all with few people to call friend
and more to call enemy
even more to say where quite dissappointed....
FAT
her first name in school,
not started by a bully
or a mean rival,
but by her sister, 
and it echoed through her soul,
repeating in her mind... over and over again,
like the ripples of still water
when a pebble is dropped
flash frozen in time
repeating,
over and over again...
It was the first name they gave her,
millions where created over the years,
some unique
some repeating again, just as the first had..
gothic they called her,
emo, fat, ugly....worse things.
but in her mind, things where worse.
everything was repeating,
over and over again,
finally she believed it. 
she asked for help, from everyone
tried to explain to parents she wasnt well,
got called a psycho for asking to see a theripist,
not from a teacher,
not from a class mate,
but from her own father, who wouldn't, couldn't,
believe there could possibly be a thing wrong....
finally, crying, she confessed her bloody secret to a teacher.
rather then giving her time,
she is sent back to class crying her eyes out, as if she wherent going through enough...
she is sent to the principals office a few minutes later, after breaking down in class...
the princlipal says she needs help,
sends her and her dad for a risk evaluation,
her dads crying as she shows him her cuts...
they walk into a hospital room, 
it smells of chemicals and hand sanitizer,
the lady at the desk gives her a smile.
then she goes into a room with a lady,
her cheeks are sunken in and shes wearing way too much makeup,
the girl is gaging on her perfume,
and she looks really intimidating....
her dark brown hair looks dead and flat
even though its a bit wavy, 
and she wears somewhat of a mocking frown.
asks her all these questions,
is mommy beating her?
no
is daddy raping her?
no
is she doing drugs?
not alot
is anyone beating her?
pass...
did anyone molest her? 
pass....
oxcarbezapine, trazadone, citalipran, clinazapam, colonipan,
valium, lithium, more.......
and thats what they gave her,
more... 
some numbed the pain
some brought it out
tearing through her organs,
she became an addict by the time she was fourteen....
over dose after over dose
some for pleasure
some for pain,
gashes on her legs getting deeper,
this time she didnt tell a soul,
not even those she had come to call friends....
wakeup she screamed in her head over and over again
as she dropped weight like it was nothing....
you cant controll it she argued as things became worse. 
at age fourteen she attempted suicide,
she didnt quite succeed.
the medication took away her aappitite....
she liked it
she hated her body
hated herself
felt out of controll
found a new way to cope
as she shoved tooth brush after toothbrush down her throat
to keep her body from nuitrients...
as she whent weeks and weeks spitting food into napkins and making excuses 
I ate at my friends house....
spoken as a whisper
heard like a sentance
echoing in her mind over and over again,
along with that word, all the words,
FAT!!!!!!
ugy, anoying, stupid, fake, worthless, nothing...
one bite she would say
rocking back and forth
craving nothing but food
her body racked with hunger pain
one bite and there she was again
FAT!
over and over and over again
back to a toothbrush
this time she sees blood
she saw her ribs
she saw her bones,
it wasnt good enough,
she almost died, again....
choking on this deep dissappointment in herself,
gaging on everything they where pushing down her throat, 
their words, and their insults, their criticism.... their drugs
all shoved down her throat like candy
and just as she was was trained to do she swallowed despite the bad taste
or the hurt
or the fact that at the rate she was going she would be dead soon...
and you know why? 
because daddy yelled 
and couldnt accept what was happening
not because he wanted to hurt her
but because it hurt him,
and she let him believe,
because she could take the hurt if it meant he didnt have too.
because mommy didnt want to sit in her room all day
smoking weed
doing nothing,
practically having us raise ourselves,
she didnt mean to take anger, or frustration or hurt out on her daughter
she suffered everyday in her solitary confinement,
and from a young age she accepted her bedroom was the cage
 her mother had created for herself.
because sister didnt want to effect her the way she did
she was just frustrated
fed up with the way things where
scared, she needed someone to take her cruelty
and to help heal her pain...
because people in school
who where so cruel
had to have learned from somewhere
and she wasnt going to play into their games,
and they knew she was an easy target
because she would never attack someone so weak
and she accepted her suffering was a sacrafice
to help all these people....
to help her dad,
her mom,
her sister,
every person who was beaten abused or hurt
 and felt so weak at home they wanted to feel strong in the one safe place they had.
because depite the fact she had died inside,
and almost passed away on the out,
it was a saccrafice she was willing to make
so that no one else would have to feel that kind of pain,
and they all inflicted it and broke her down'untill there was nothing left but a shell
of somthing that could have been
and never had the chance
and why? 
because she would take it and wouldnt strike back,
because sometimes "just taking it"
isnt so much about the weakness not to do anything
but about the strangth not to hurt others the way they hurt you...


Details | Rhyme | |

Our Hearts Are Broken Too

(In memory of those lost in Newtown, CT) We may not know the answers to all the questions asked We cannot control how great the pain or how long it will last. Nothing we can do will erase the pain you bear But we cannot remain silent as if we didn’t care. The blood of precious children was shed this very day And grieving families wonder when this pain will go away. We know time will heal a multitude of wounds But we also can be very sure it won’t be very soon. Evil came to visit here and we all wonder why The souls of friends and children were made to say good-bye What happened here today we may not ever know And haunting thoughts of loved ones will follow where we go. You may be called to travel a higher road than we But you cannot travel faster than our prayers that follow thee. We know that we can never bear the grief that you go through Just remember we are here – Our hearts are broken too. Written by John Posey 12/16/12


Details | Rhyme | |

I Need Time to Heal

Tell me why, but tell me True-
Spare me the heartbreak of a Lie
I would lay forever in these meadows...
Forever, until I die!
To rid myself of all the Pain,
And the Sorrows of what I feel
To ease my Mind, my worried Brain
(Lord! The Cuts! I need to heal)

*Referring to my problems with "Borderline Personality Disorder"; many of us are "cutters"


Details | Rhyme | |

For Darkness I Now Plea

For Darkness I Now Plea


Harbinger of death, 
bring ever sweet solace to me
Stop this pain,
end this bittersweet agony

Stay the hand ,
that breaks this bitter heart
Send this soul,
into everland for a new start

Another life ,
in another spiritual realm
A bright day,
joyful love not to overwhelm

Death bring thy ,
dark and deep eternal sting
Set it well,
hear me as I long to sing

Ye author of ,
life's great need to end
Demand anything ,
I have service to spend

Harbinger of death, 
bring ever sweet solace to me
Stop this pain,
end this bittersweet agony

Robert Lindley, 08-21-1977


Details | Ballad | |

Lost Love

If only you could see the tears
In the world you left behind
You fill my days, my nights, my dreams
You’re all that’s on my mind
Your laugh I’ll never hear again
Your smile I’ll never see
Memories now are all I have
Since loneliness found me
Time was never on your side
Your short life had to end
Now I'm left in pain without
My love and my best friend
The sadness, the emptiness
The pain I have to face
Will never leave my life
For you’re a loss I can’t replace
Even though the rain will fall
And the sun will still shine on
My life will just exist
Because my whole world now is gone
You are an Angel high above now
Watching over me
But someday I know once again
Together we will be
For when my time on earth is done
You’ll come and take my hand
And guide us to eternal love
Together in God's land..


By Raina Hutchins


Details | Rhyme | |

Philosophy on Life, Evil and the World

Philosophy on Life, Evil and the World

The Masters, serve their greed
take from those in great need
Such is evil's darkest cloaks
swallows that so often chokes

The Blinded, serve very well
masters in the pit of Hell
Each has a false laid pride
darkness is where they hide

The Slaves, eat deep regret
of life they'll never get
Each accepts a darkened yoke
defiance rarely ever spoke

The Brave, sail with heart
paying from the very start
Sacrifice to save our Souls
Deep river, so many shoals

The Warriors, cut ever deep
die as family sets to weep
Freedom's mantle they serve
with epic hearts, iron nerves

The Innocent, stand so bare
suffer greatly, so few care
Yet they are the true treasure
their test is the real measure!

Robert J. Lindley, 09-05-2014

note: Impossible to include ever 
group so this poet came up with 
these six to write about...


Details | I do not know? | |

Abortion (Another Life Gone)

There you are being conceived in your mother's womb. 
Before you know it you will be born in this world 
real soon. 

As you develop; you start to move around. You take in 
your first food as your mom gobbles it down. 

Your ears start to develop; behold now you can hear! 
You start to move around as the sounds you hear are 
weird. 

You look around to only darkness. So you yawn and fall 
asleep. Look at those precious toes that are taking 
shape on your little feet! 

You hear your mother talking and you react to her voice. 
You start to kick. You start to coo. It seems to make 
you rejoice. 

I can hear the sound of your heart beat, and at hearing 
it I fall in love. I take a moment to see what is now 
going on in heaven above. 

Yah smiles down upon you as a precious baby is starting 
to take shape. Everything seems good so far, but hold up 
baby...wait! 

A pain hits you hard. You're wondering what's the 
commotion. You don't even know it, but your mom 
is now having an abortion. 

You don't deserve this. You're a precious baby. To be 
born is the Father's will. But you don't even know it, 
because now you are being killed. 

The pain is killing you...unbearable pain, but what can 
you do. It hurts too much to say this is what your mom 
thinks of you. 

Some think they know better, but your life began at 
conception. Why do some think otherwise? Is it because 
they fell victim to the devil's deception? 

Look at you torn to pieces. I'm crying at the sight 
of you. But it's a relief to your mother, she sees a 
different point of view. 

Another child dead. Another life gone. I can't control 
my emotion. A precious gift from above is now the victim 
of another abortion. 


Details | Free verse | |

Heavens' Doorway

One day there was an accident, and to heavens gate I was called.
As an angel sat down beside me, upon the bed I had been put upon.
Such a shining warmth ensued as it held me in its thrall.
A thought from God proclaimed, “What with your life have you done?”
Then all of life fled past me, but not as I did expect to see it done.
For all I saw and felt were things I hadn’t known I had done, and yet…
So much pain inflicted to each, with such little words and thoughts.
I never would have known such power, by one person, could be wrought.
I bowed my head in shame at the pain I knew I could not undo, yet…
Suddenly, I found myself forgiven. Yes, TRULY it was true!
Hallelujah became my amazed and impassioned cry before him, that night!
His warmth had never wavered, nor even his illustrious, wonderful light.
How could he forgive me, someone as wretched and lowly as I?
And yet, he did… and so he changed my life from then on out. 
But low and behold he wasn’t yet done with me, or so my story goes…
He sent me back to my home again… it in comparison brought me low.
But he said my work lay uncompleted, so now I must go back…
He said to stay clean and I would blossom… What do you think of that?
A veil he placed upon my eyes to remove me from the knowledge of all I’d known.
Then he sent me from his side, where I could not see him but knew he was.
Now, here I stand before you, a totally changed and humbled one.
Still, I have found I have sinned again… I know he must have known.
Perhaps some day, as I patiently wait… I’ll be allowed once more within his gate.
Only time will tell, as again I’ll feel every ones pain…
All I can say is: God Forgive Me… as I continue to wait…

(This Near Death experience really happened and changed my life.)


Details | Free verse | |

ALL I COULD SEE

In an abyss of mar;
I was sunk.
My thoughts swimming;
in a pool of masquerade shame.
A dagger in my head;
All I could see was an evening of score.

With a flip of a hand;
Like an angered red dragon.
I breathed fire and redemption;
In the midst of rage and terror.
I had blood on my hands;
All I could hear was a cry from the soil.

In a faction of a second;
My heart had raced.
Thoughts crumbled with confusion.
A wanderer in the desert of oz.
My legs felt like shattered glass.
And all I could think was vengeance.

He had tainted her hands;
Abused them in pain.
She had screamed inside.
A caged animal in a circus.
Unfamiliar territory scared her.
And all I could excrete were tears dry.

With a bow he had decorated her.
A misdeed he did.
It was physical for him, 
Emotional damage for her.
Humanity lost inside a cave of bats and bears.
And all I could hear were screams.

Murder she wrote; the opposite.
Beauty like a bunch of roses; yes.
Heart like a garden of roses; yes.
A cactus environment she delved;
With eyes wide shut.
All I could hear were whispers.

With pique like that of a tiger.
I bore teeth, muscle and archery.
Blinded by a trim cloth of red.
A knight’s tale it foretold.
He had hurt my offspring.
All I could see was night.

Emotionally; I covered him with guilt.
Overt, I smeared him with shame.
Physically I scathed him; barbarian.
A man’s title he does not deserve.
Physically I had marked him for the world to see.
And all I could still see was darkness.

He had hurt my offspring.
All I could see was red. 

© Herzel Poshiwa. 



Details | Rhyme | |

The Gate

The Gate

As night begins to fall, she sits quietly at the gate.
Her ambitions are high, but it is up to fate.
For he's not the only one, that death will endure.
She waits like a stone, she wants to be sure.
She cries out to God, believing not, that He is there.
She debates once again, that this life is, or not fair.
The wind seeps through her, as if she were a window.
The gun at her head, awaiting the hard blow.
Her love went away, without making a sound.
He's buried beyond the gate, six feet underground.
She longs for his arms to wrap around her tight.
It won't be long now, she will be with him tonight.
As she counts to three her hand starts to quiver.
She pulls the trigger slightly, as she feels a slight shiver.
She is now ready, to commit this horrible sin.
Someone will find her in the morning, and open the gate to put her in.
She will be wearing a white dress, like she did on their wedding day.
There will be no more sadness, like when the cancer took him away.
There was a loud explosion, her body, now limp on the ground.
Her spirit rose out of her, escaping to where it was bound.
She opened her eyes, and then began to scream.
There was nothing but darkness, it had to be a dream.
She searched around blindly, then she heard a loud voice.
It asked, "Why did you do this?" She replied, that she had no choice.
She heard her name being called, and went to find the source.
She was startled when she found him, he sat laughing without remorse.
He then welcomed her in, as she entered this empty space.
She heard voices screaming in agony, a puzzled look upon her face.
She knew something was wrong, and began to run away.
But there was nowhere to go, this is where she would stay.
She then prayed to God, with everything that she had.
He replied, "I am sorry,” He sounded disappointed and mad.
He explained to her, His decision, why this was the only choice He had.
He disappeared quietly into the distance, leaving her to remember what she had.
She looked up to find her husband, waiting patiently by an unopened door.
She begins to run in his direction, wanting to be with him so much more.
He blows her a kiss slowly, across the air it fell.
Leaving her feeling shameful, feeling that she deserved this Hell.
Thinking that she should have waited, but knowing now that it was too late.
Oh how she wishes to go back, where she sat waiting patiently by the gate.

11-07-10


Details | Narrative | |

Sorrow

She sits alone 
She draws her knees up to her shoulders, hugging them tightly
She shivers in the icy wind 
Her teeth chatter and the stream of tears from her eyes, sting her cheeks 
As she lifts her head towards the heavens, 
Her eyes burn with pain and her piercing scream, barely human, expresses her Excruciating 
suffering and anguish

She is gripped by immense sorrow, the most powerful and destructive emotion
It roughly envelopes her, throwing her into a pit of darkness, filled with evil shadows
The shadows claw at her, ripping into her flesh like daggers
She shakes violently, tasting blood as she bites down hard on her bottom lip
But she feels no pain, her body is numb, numbed by the demons of sorrow, who, 
Are slowly overpowering her, devouring her heart 
And locking her in an eternal web of pain

She is engulfed by fear as the intense sorrow surrounding her, compresses her
She gasps for air as the merciless hands of sorrow close around her throat
She fights in her lonely vacuum, with everything she has
She reaches for her only comfort, her fingers coil around the blade
As she stretches her arms out in front of her, her void eyes gaze upon her pale skin
Her skin is etched with scars
Her scars an eternal, entwined, tattoo of her excruciating suffering
As she runs the jagged blade over her skin, its cold feel calms her
The compressing sorrow surrenders
This is her saviour, the one who can release her from this life of pure hell
Her skin begins to open, the river of blood flowing strong
Her pain is flung into the open, through her wounds, 
Leaving a sense of tranquility in her distraught heart

Her red stained fingertips caress her raw wounds
She is mesmorised by the life force flowing from her, as it paints 
Her tragic story on her body
Painful tears bleed from her eyes as regret shudders through her
She rocks backwards and forwards, lulling herself into a sense of peace
Her body is drained
As she lies back she becomes limp
Her eyes close and her whispered prayers fill the open air,
Creating the painful melody her heart sings
As she slips away

Thunder roars and the starry heavens open 
As God’s tears rain over His beloved daughter, 
Healing her wounds and piecing her broken soul back together
As the sun rises above her, 
It illuminates her peaceful expression
Her earthly father collapses besides her
His silent tears wash over her beautiful, pale face
As he lifts his dead child in his arms, 
Vicious sorrow rips his heart apart, 
Creating wounds which will never heal


Details | Rhyme | |

Field of Flowers and Stones

Lasting memories haunt a tearful mind
How distant the dreams that no one now owns
Etched marble, another name to remind
Lay in silent fields of flowers and stones

To search for days that will never be
and unearth youthful years that quickly passed
To stand in a field where soldiers are free
and know their torment is over at last

Eyes flow freely at a stone to behold
Brushing her hand across a marble name
Her fingers tremble for a son she can't hold
and years she will live with pain she will claim

Handed a flag that eight soldiers did fold
Knowing that her son will never grow old


Details | I do not know? | |

Bath of Blood

I sit here shaking in this warm water
The pain has come, for my life to barter.
Should i do it, let everything go.
I grab that razor and never let go.

I tilt my head back and take a breath
I soon feel the pain inside my chest.
My heart is pounding faster and faster.
I think in my head now I\'m the master.

Cutting and cutting away that pain
as the blood drips down, my life slowly fades.
I drop the blade, and watch it fade, into the 
Bath of blood that i have made.

Everythings gone, my life to.
into that red liquid, that makes me and you.
i am now free of all that pain, and all the suffering that never went away.

So now i lay here in my Bath of blood, looking down in at the soapy suds. Was it 
a dream or was it a fantasy.
I look at my wrists....and they still bleed.


Details | Rhyme | |

A Mother's Heart

A Mother's Heart

She brought this babe
Into this world with such care,
A life full of hope and dreams
Nothing will happen to him...nothing would dare.
She sends him to school
And days filled with little league,
Never a thought he would
One day leave dressed in fatigues.
That day came too soon
A day covered in clouds,
Kissing him goodbye 
Knowing he would make her proud.
Her son fought for his beliefs
For the red, white, and blue,
For independence and justice
Freedom for his mother and for you.
There is nothing more wrenching
Then that of a mothers cry,
For the loss of her child
And the call saying her son has died.
You see I can not understand
I can not say its okay,
All I can do now 
Is kneel down and pray.
"Dear God
I know you have taken him
And made him strong once more,
But I miss him so terribly
All the way to my core.
There is no way to describe
This pain which fills my soul,
Could you not take me too
Release me from this black hole."
Her son fought for his beliefs
For the red, white, and blue,
For independence and justice
Freedom for his mother and for you.
Can you even for a moment
Imagine the ripping apart,
The pain and agony of
A mother's heart.
2004
Edie Hendrikse


Details | Rhyme | |

Last Breath

There’s no glory in death
As you take your last breath
Loved ones sit and mourn
Thinking they won’t see the dawn

But they will and here’s why
They ease the pain as they cry
They will move on each day
Pain slowly will go away

Until eventually 
Life is as normal as it can be
Till the pain hurts them less
After we all say bless

For a moment or two
You forget its true
Then the thought comes again 
With a little less of pain

Years will pass and you’ll cry
On special days till you die
Then loved ones you will meet again
Find them all free from pain

I have absolutely no doubt
That’s what deaths all about
So it’s true when they say
Time heals a bit everyday


Details | Elegy | |

I Need Your Help Daddy

I’m tired
I’m Physically and Emotionally tired
I don’t want to be the strong one anymore
I can’t this time
I don’t know what to do Daddy
I need your help down here

I can’t get back in control of my emotions 
I’m having a hard time dealing with your absence
I’m having a hard time standing by myself
I need your help Daddy

I’m broken and lost without you Daddy
I need your will to want to carry on
I need your strength to over come this
I need your strength to stay standing
Your courage to fight back again
I need your help 

Please Daddy I’m at a loss
How am I suppose to do this
I need your guidance 
I need you to guide me back
To whom I was before
I need your help Daddy
I need your help







Details | Free verse | |

Dementia

He was always so happy
strong and bold.
He'd give you the shirt off of his back.
Tough.
Independent.
He had a rough life
growing up through the depression,
but like he always does,
he got through it.
He has two boys, of whom he is so proud.
Moved from Regina, to Victoria.
He had the best life anyone his age could have wanted.
But ever since his wife died, 
he has not been the same.
Sad
Lonely
Empty.
But like he has always done,
he got through it.
Mind slipping, 
just a little forgetful.
That's how it always starts out...
But like always, he powered through it, 
until now...
He is not the same person that I used to know.
He been sentenced to the prison in his own mind.
Possessed by the thoughts of his dogs ashes.
He likes to play the blame game,
but we know he doesn't remember that it was him.
He wakes up in the night
shaking with pain, 
tears streaming down his face.
There is nothing we can do,
Oh well...
Two more tylenol.
Hold on to hope
for as long as you can,
It's only a matter of time now.
He gets vocal, a very loud tone.
He'll block you in your room
and make false accusations
But we know that it's the pain induced monster in him.
Tick tock, tick tock...
You can't handle the stress anymore
you have to leave.
Just hope for the best, 
maybe it will get better.
Surprise, it doesn't.
Your denial is foolish, everyone knows 
what happens next.
Sedation
Medication
Anger
Hurt
All results of
dementia


Details | Narrative | |

The Empty Tissue Box

My heart was in such pain
I felt like I was going to go insane
I just don't know what to do 
And my eyes full of tears that distort my view

I fell to my knees and felt the urge
My muscle tighten and pin needles struck me like a surge
My body was warm and with feelings so confused
My mind felt sadness had fused

I could not conquer my fears
I just sat down and fell into tears
When some close to you passes on
It felt like a warmth has gone

So I raised my hand towards a box that was empty with no tissue
I first was embarrass and had a little bit of issue
All my friends hugged me and said sorry for your loss
So now I cry in my bed and toss


April 14, 2013


Details | Rhyme | |

A Soul Awakened

She is the muse to her own sorrow; She is the digger of her grave. She is the painter of her ocean view and every fatal wave. She is the shadow of her Father; She is the darkness in your sight. She is the night without the stars surrounding pale moonlight. She is the music with no words; She is sweet love without the reason. She is your dreamer with submission cold by warmth with every season. She is your pet with cold intentions; She is your baby scared and shaken. She is the bold and pure- the lost and found, She is a soul awakened.


Details | Free verse | |

My Hell

I fall down
deeper and deeper
into oblivion
nothing
only darkness.
the sounds of evil
dripping into my ears
slithering farther
and sliding down into me
filling me with echoes.
terror courses through
my veins
into each cell
turning them against
me
they are no longer mine
they follow another
a stronger being.
icy breezes come
they whisper to me
they say I'm bad
they call me to them
the breezes dance
hug me
covering me
hiding me from the light
shielding me from hope.
falling deeper
only down
my eyes are taunted
I see people
the ones I know
love
they are hurt
hurting
by me
I have betrayed them
left them
I am hurting them
it is me
but I can't stop.
my mind is plagued
sick
new thoughts
 every second
comes a new terror
a cruel joke
all a prank.
only deeper do I fall
light is disappearing
becoming dimmer
fading fast.
all a game
for one person
the puppeteer
the ringmaster
the man in the
mask
the one who is running the show
the show that is me.
he sees me falling
he laughs
I can't see him
but he is there
everywhere
teasing my brain
taunting my senses
he hates me
he wants to hurt me.
he throws it
the knife
I feel the pain
running up my leg
showing my bones
releasing my blood
it is blue
my blood is cold
it splatters my face
sprinkling my features
dotting them with blue
the blue liquid drips
jumping onto my tongue
I taste dirt
my blood is dirt
blue is all I see
blue is all I become
I am blue
blue is me.
a distant shout
who is it?
a cry for help
surely
the sound is mangled
twisted
young
desperate
hopeless
mine
the sound is mine
I shut my mouth
but I still hear it
chilling my blue blood
ringing in my ears
shaking my breathing
jump-starting my heart
then it's over
the scream has ceased
and silence returns
sounding more deadly than ever before.
still falling
only black do I see
the evil
the monsters' playground
the demons' joyride
and someone is hungry
it wants me
my innocence
my purity
it wants to take it
it feeds on people
people like me.
weightlessness
objects hitting me
ghosts' fingers prodding me
as I fall
I fall down
down into this never-ending hole
this abyss
for eternity
restless
empty
yet full
filled with misery
my worst fears
come back
how did he know?
he knows I'm afraid
the darkness
doesn't help me see
I can't see why
how does he do this?
they cut me again
spilling my blood
oh, the blue
I don't even feel it
I am numb
the sound of me
my skin
being sliced
a quick slashing
and they are done
I am cut
my legs
my arms
my stomach
my face
my neck
I can't see my blood
but I can see how evil it must look.
the thoughts that fell
fell down with me
they too
are damned
they talk to me
they tell me what they see
they can see
blue
yes blue
my cold blood
it is everywhere
I am pale
white
I look sick they say
oh, no
they say
oh, no
they see the bottom
be ready
they say
be ready.
I fall faster still
slowing for nothing
for no one
being pulled down
the puppeteer has me
he's got my string
and he's pulling
with no sign of letting go.
now I hear a song
they all sing it
the notes are cruel
unforgiving
they bump into the others
struggling to be heard
with no set order
it is musical chaos
he yells to me
it is beautiful
and he sings along to his song
it's made for me
musical notes are played
they come up to me
they greet me
they jump
right into my cuts
surging into my blood
they search inside me
no mercy
moving faster
the drum
keeping them steady
pounds faster
picking up tempo
searching
searching
until
they found it
they found
my heart
my soul
the music does the talking
it says to hush
hush now
slow down
my heart listens
and I get sleepy
just stop
they say
just stop
the music is evil
played by the man
the man in the mask
my brains sends
a message
one final request
it says to my heart
speed up
it says
speed up, can't you see?
she is dying
it says
you must speed up!
I still fall
with no way up
letting go of hope
why dream?
dreaming of being saved
when I already know
I'll only be dropped.
I smell
something burnt
burning
oh, no
I know what
that smell
it is flesh
not mine
surely
but belongs to someone else
someone close
they too
they smell of dirt
sinners burning
dead
they are nothing to me
they are the stench
in my nose
nothing more
the smell overcomes all
all the other senses
until it becomes me
and I burn too.
even in the dark
the black
I see something
darker
blacker than black
they are shadows
they mock me
they play
they sing
they dance
they laugh
I fill with evil
hatred
a longing to hurt
hurt the ones behind it all
then
without warning
I hear him
laughing
my pain
is his pleasure
oh so dark
it's over
I'm at the bottom
laying on the cold ground
in a small ball
too weak to stand
in a pool
of dark blue blood
I hold myself tight
I can't trust
these creatures
these beasts.
he likes my weakness
he tells me I am small
I am ugly
I am worthless
I am nothing
he laughs when I cry
I thought that
maybe
just maybe
it would be better
down here
instead of up there.
it's not.
hell is not a game.
death is not an
easy way out.
do not try to visit me.
do not try to rescue me.
for I am more lost
than I hope you will
ever be.
now that I am
at my fate
at the entrance to hell
at the bottom of this grave
of my eternity
and if I am truly
here forever,
I'll have plenty of time
to ask myself
why did I jump?


Details | Lyric | |

From The Peircing Of An Arrow To The Cold Hearted Fate Of love

her life is on the tip of his tongue
the sparkle leaves her eyes
an arrow to his chest
drawing her to her death
a feather falling from the sky
the death of an angel
her wings turn blood red
like the color of the red sea
the sword drawn out of the ground
by her own hands
what he could not do himself
she has done for him
He falls unto to his knees
the arrow she had put into his chest
the greatest of betrayals
She asked for her death wish
Holding the ring in her palm
He looks into her eyes
watching the love she had left for him disappear
Falling into despair
Her face hitting the ground
Blood surrounded her body
He watched as she died
He couldn't move from the love that had pierced his chest


Details | Free verse | |

Words Unspoken

                                                  Anger shrouds my sorrow,
                                                  a storm rages deep within.
                                                  Questions without answers
                                                  swirl around my mind.
                                                  Damn! this emotional confusion.

                                                  Why the sacrifice?
                                                  Why the trade off?
                                                  Was it loneliness?
                                                  Was it greed?
                                                  Damn! the sadness I cannot feel.

                                                  Did you love me?
                                                  Were you proud of me?
                                                  Did you even care?
                                                  Why didn’t we talk?
                                                  Damn! your legacy of silence.
                                
                                      Rage! Rage! against the death of the light.
                                      I curse the words unspoken, the truth not shed.
                           Why God?...Why?...Why must we part before the heart to heart?  


Details | Narrative | |

DEMONS ALSO CRY

DEMONS ALSO CRY

Beyond the crave for death
All I sought was first,
Weep-not my newborn soul
Where fireflies shine lighter than the lamps
And fishes swam faster than their homes
Like  trampled troubled tramps,
Then, demons also cry.

Groans and moans of pain,
Down they roam like rain
Memories sparked with flashes of feisty flare
For all that is left is nothing but darkness
Piercing the thread of our bond
That even angels dare not dare
Then, demons also cry

Here, days brimmed with sadness
To miscarriage of nights darkness
That even birds glide backward
And when asked why, we say, its nature to nurture
Conscience lye frozen in muss, has God punished us?
Que sera, sera and all go wayward,
Then, demons are also crying
						By Tutuola michael


Details | Free verse | |

Untwisted

Sometimes the memories won’t fade 
         All the places we have seen
         All the prices we have paid 
The memories of the happy as well as the sad 
            The people we’ve lost
           The friends that we had 
Some memories just seem like a ghost 
I always lost everyone that I loved the most 
The wind would just carry them away 
             Along with my tears 
            And my ability to pray
    I wonder how far is heaven from here?
              How many more heartaches 
                 How many more tears 
              I wonder how far it is away
Because I have so many things that I wish to say 
To all the people that I loved and I lost 
             I’m not even tripping 
             My heart paid the cost 
The reaper rode the river in a bikers disguise 
I’ll never forget the fear in my mother’s eyes 
    As he drug her under and then let her go 
Through my four year old veins hate started to grow 
My eyes were blind my ears were deaf 
After that I forgot  
           There was anything left  
Karma is like poker for it is bound to luck 
When I was just a boy 
God through me under the truck 
Of all the things in life we feel 
   We are all bound to God’s will 
Passion is a doorway between love and hate 
    God is the dealer in the game of fate 
              Our place is not to question why 
                       For if we do our faith will die 
            The deeper we hate the deeper we love 
            I was gifted wisdom by the Lord above 
                    Every gift comes at a price 
A world of experience behind my advice 
     Every smile holds a lifetime of pain 
Nothing that happens should happen in vein 
                         It is our choice that which we do 
 Know in your heart these words are true 
The harder we fall the further we climb 
             No ones life is totally sublime 
Illusion after illusion will be offered to you 
                 But only the living word is true 
The living word that beats in your heart 
Will keep you safe as the world falls apart 
Through the pain of a boy watching his mother die 
It’s never to late to kiss the sky
A man of faith who could never give up 
Please come break my bread and share in my cup 
By the time our journey is through 
                      I’ll share all I am with you 
          Hopefully somewhere in my words you’ll see 
              ---Untwisted is truly the way to be---



Details | Dramatic Verse | |

The Other Mom

I was laying on the beach
On a hot August morn
A sudden pain in my gut
I knew that something was wrong
It's Eddie.  I felt it so strong
I Picked up my cell and I called
The emotional pain of it all
My body curled up in a ball
I sat up again to be sure, 
the solar plexus was sore
Why to I question these signs
I know that there isn't a cure
For the feelings I want to ignore
He never answered the phone
I packed up my stuff and went home
I worried all day and all night
The sunrise brought more than just light
The loud banging began at the door
I peeked through the blinds to be sure
There were cops all over the street
Guns drawn made the picture complete
I opened the door full of fear
Oh my God!  Why are they here?
My heart dropped, I wanted to hide
When he said "Sgt. White, homicide."
Is your son home he wanted to know
With his foot in the door I said no
Do you mind if we just have a look
And I backed up after biting the hook
They swarmed through the house 
Guns up in the air
Upstairs to his room
They looked everywhere
My solar plexus was right
I'm glad I came home last night
But where did he go?  I needed to know
His innocence still in my sight
The officer said have a seat
Let's talk about where he could be
A boy was found dead in the street
A witness put Ed at the scene
Don't worry he said as I pulled my robe tight
Your son was a victim of robbery last night
I know he's afraid to come out in the light
I didn't believe him.  But I knew he was right.
My son was afraid and now I knew why
He took someone's life who's mother will cry
He was just seventeen a year younger than Ed
Why do these kids seem to be so misled?

What happened that night is a mom's biggest fear
A child was lost in the drug war I hear
The exchange in the alley of weed for the cash
Was a set up to rob him of all  that he had
When the kid put a gun against my son's head
Said 'empty your pockets' or soon you'll be dead
He had no idea that the pocket was packed
With a 38 special protecting the cash
The rest of story is packed in a box
The panic, the fear, the action, the shock
He emptied the gun and ran for his life
While Nicholas bled on the pavement that night
My heart cries to God asking why must I be
The mom of the kid who killed her baby
I cry for her loss as if it were mine
I beg her forgiveness, and I offer her mine.
You don't want to be either one of these moms
Our children at risk, a sign of the times
God please shine Your light on this good Earth today
We're all human beings who've just lost our way.


Details | Free verse | |

First Thing You Should Know 2

First thing you should know, is this isn’t a poem, it’s not a story, it’s not a song.  These 
are just the mad ramblings of a genius with a headache. 
Watching the smoke curl between his fingertips, he wonders.  Is it his body that’s on 
fire or his soul?  Physically he feels fine yet he sees the flames, inside the pain is 
excruciating yet, not a scratch to be seen.  Isn’t that a thought though, not a scratch to 
be seen on his soul.  Why is it that the scratches and cuts that do the most damage are 
the ones you can never see?  How can that much pain not leave a visible mark?  How 
much pain can the soul take before it turns into the story of humpty dumpty, never to 
be put back together again?  Isn’t it funny how you can forget your dying, when you 
have died inside?
First thing you should know, is this isn’t a poem, it’s not a story, it’s not a song.  These 
are just the mad ramblings of a genius with a headache.


Details | Blank verse | |

The Bones In The Hole

As a star to a child,
Far from earth,
Born in the wild,
Nurtured from birth,

By an addict within,
Leaves behind a mistake,
Forgiveness for her sin,
Sympathy she'll fake.

Disbelief arose the town,
Betrayed by their own kind,
Picture torn down,
No more body to find,

The departure was planned,
By an indecisive soul,
A printed story to stand,
The bones in the hole.