My shallow waters have failed to hide
the deeper agony pulsating inside.
I could forgive your lies but not forget.
Do you have remorse, do you feel regret?
Feelings were buried in a shallow grave
as we failed to mend the love God gave.
You failed to speak and I failed to listen,
Fingers are pale where golden bands once glistened.
Broken hearts called to each other refusing to bend.
Not so long ago, I called you my best friend.
Now, I'm left to grieve my failed marriage.
The love we shared, your words disparaged.
I could forgive your lies but not forget.
Where is your remorse or display of regret?
I can no longer burden myself with this shame.
Standing tall, I have given my sorrow a name.
I struggled to save our once happy home,
but you chipped it away when you decided to roam.
So goodbye I shout to you and to failure!
Moving forward, your love is no longer my cure.
My life is becoming a new adventure,
and memories of your face are becoming a blur.
Yes, I could have forgiven your lies, tried to forget,
if your heart felt remorse or just a little regret.
* a work of fiction
For Nailed or Failed Contest (Black Eyed Susan)
It was their night they shone bright as they danced their sweet dance
Two lovers embraced in their world of romance.
They laughed and they cried as their eyes locked in stare
It was their world for this moment as if no one was there.
And their steps they so flawlessly glided in tune,
To a melody that touched everyone in that room.
Their passion brought envy to onlookers there,
Who secretly questioned their own love affair.
But as the night closed and came to an end
The lovers were blind to what lie round the bend.
The house and the cars and the jobs that went bad
The kids drove them crazy and their savings were drab.
So they fought to hold on to the things in their life,
That caused them so much of their pain and their strife.
They fought with each other like enemies do,
And dismissed in their life everything that was true.
So when sickness and hardships and troubles occurred,
Their vows to commit seemed truly absurd.
Their home and their kids would now take a backseat,
For their moral obligation they chose not to meet.
So I Ask …
What happened to that dance they danced so well?
With passion and truth everyone could tell.
What happened to their dance where they held so tight?
What happened to the wonder of their glorious night?
What happened to the words that charmed their ears?
With a passionate rhythm that brought them to tears.
What happened to those vows that poured from their heart?
The “I love you forever and till death do us part”.
For these aren’t just words we borrow for the day,
From another who tells us this is what we must say.
We say them cause it’s what we feel true in our heart,
It’s a God given blessing we commit from the start.
But these words are now lost as they fall on deaf ears,
Since the pain and the struggles they’ve created these years.
So the lesson here learned dear people of odd,
Is that love is so fragile but made strong with our God.
So stop fighting for power and money or need,
For all of this nonsense is only our greed.
Keep God in your life and he’ll walk you through,
When heartache and pain and losses ensue.
For why commit vows in the eyes of our God,
And not call on him when life gets too hard?
For the truth of our vows we are all meant to see,
is that marriage is not, made of two, but of three
If reading these words ring some truth in your heart,
Decide that today you will make a new start.
Go hug your spouse and say something kind
Don’t let the small stuff cloud up your mind.
We’re all just lost souls who are trying to cope
If not there for each other then where is the hope?
You see, the anger, the fight
that in us abide, Is only the insecure child inside.
So rise up above all this fear and this pain,
And see all the beauty that there is to gain.
By trusting in God and his will for you
Together forever he’ll see you both through.
For life is too short for our miserly ways
cheap on our love hence dreading our days.
He made us to love in all that we do
To wake up each morning and start us a new.
So pray for your spouse, ask God to be kind
To the person you prayed in the beginning to find.
They’re still the same person you loved from the start
But life and it’s troubles have hardened their heart.
You vowed that you’d love them in sickness and health
Now is your chance to show God what you felt.
So rise up my friend, don’t say that you’re through
For what if your loving God gave up on you?
THE WIDOW'S DAY
He’d been dead for forty years
But she carried on each day
Got up at eight and dressed
Ate luncheon on a tray
No bride was kissed as well
No groom felt more complete
And one year was their gift
When Fate served them defeat
She should have followed him
But life grabbed her instead
Who is to say what’s better
The living or the dead
Each day as sun drew low
She tossed a glass of wine
Lolled on the white porch swing
And took a dip through time
His shadow found her then
She touched his rugged face
It emphasized the fact
No one would take his place
And though she craved wild nights--
Cold loneliness was cruel--
she lived her life alone
becoming no man's fool.
I am fearful and full of dread,
As I lay here on our marriage bed,
We have had yet another fight,
And as yet it is our end of night.
He says he wants to show me he only cares,
But it is not love I feel as I lay there.
I say "No I am to sore and in pain."
He moves forward anyways as my tears fall down like rain.
I beg and plead and say "Please no more"
But that is not what for me he has in store.
I give up as my claims fall on deaf ears,
I just lay there in my pool of tears.
I know he knows what he is doing,
That this is not my choosing.
What once was an expression and an act of our love making,
Has now become something that he thinks is his right in just taking.
The days that I used to crave and hunger for his touch,
Have now turned to an act I must endure as such.
Even though he knows this is wrong and our fight has really has no end,
He believes that in this and this alone our love will transcend.
As he is holding me there on that bed,
Another world is where I go in my head.
He is my husband and I am his wife,
I can't believe this has become our life!
I lay there numb of spirit and mind,
Waiting and waiting for the end of time.
I think of all the ways that I can make him pay,
But in the end as usual I stay!!!
This is not the life I bargained for,
There in this life has to be more.
Why with this one man is it hard for me to walk away?
With any other man I would not stay!
Now the time has come that I can take no more,
Though the time has not come to settle the score.
He begs and pleads for me to stay,
He can't bare for our love to go away!
I still love him and I know that is sick,
But we cannot help who our hearts pick!
I can however leave him alone,
I won't write nor will I phone.
His days of cruel treatment and torture so vile,
Are long over, there will be no trial!
I have become judge, jury and executioner in this relationship!
You can bet there will no second trips!
Time to move on and to heal,
I cannot and will not give him an appeal.
A new life is what I am forever bound,
A new love is what I found.
He does not get all of me,
For now he is fine to let me be.
Will I ever be able to love again with all my heart?
Who knows, but now is the time to start.
My message lies not in the sentence
If you learn to read between the lines
You will hear stories in my silence
My life is not about roses and wines
I look strong on the exterior
But I am weak on the interior
I may be smiling on the outside
But I am hurting on the inside
I can’t help but wonder, about the blunder, of building a one room log cabin,
Where man and wife, lived a private life, ‘til kids became real, not imagined
With no partitions, or new additions, you’d think their sex life would run ashore.
But they both knew, how to make it through, by inventing a thing called the chore.
As each kid did sprout, pa had to go out, and think up a new job for the tot.
He soon realized, that for his farm’s size, there were more tots then jobs to be got.
And the matriarch, made the remark, that inside we plum ran out of space.
So they tried to rid, their house of kids, as fast as were made in the first place.
At last the last lad, made a nice lass glad, got married and had a grand party,
But pa had ma’s hind, right on his mind; they arrived at the party, tardy.
Well all went ok, until the sad day, when the old man’s life ran out of time.
And then poor ma, lost her chutzpah, plus the cabin exceeded its prime.
So ma did call, her last son Paul, asked if he knew what she should do then,
He said oh dear, I just moved here, and that we don’t even have a den.
But son relents, and acts the gent, there is space in one nook of our room.
If you feed cows, and all the sows, cause heck ma, I’ve got a new bride groom.
A small romantic rain poem dedicated to hubby.
wrote by Mrs.Madhavi.Suyog.Pagare
"Ohhhh Rain..Shower again!!!!! "
Showering in the rain,
Draining the pain!
Enflueraging the essence of arenicolous sand,
Feeling blessed porting on this beautiful greenary land! Trees were roaming
under fiercing winds,
Thanks nature for benevolently so kind!
Sip of sizzling coffee With Caramalized sugar,
Cheers hubby to accompany me my gelling agar!
Wanna capture this Driplets of aromatic water nearby lake,
So that I can make an icy snowflake!
That's amazing, "but ohhhh God, I wish my honey is here".
Wrote by Mrs.Madhavi.Suyog.Pagare
She said her husband’s looking fine
(I know she drank a lot of wine…)
For Andrea’s Itty Bitty contest
They vowed to be together till death,
Oh, that day was such a holy gift!
Both freely gave their selves to each other;
And received the gift of one another,
Hearts full of dreams they sailed the rough seas;
Their love they knew would bring them still peace;
Strong winds blew, rains fell, and thunders struck
With their pure love they never got stuck;
The changing weather continued to unfold;
A western wind zephyr blew the couples cold;
They found themselves no longer intertwined;
And sprung from each, passions of their own mind;
They danced to different tunes and speckled inspiration;
It seemed to be a dance of good synchronization;
And when they danced to the same melody;
They found themselves not in good harmony;
For they have valued their song of individuality;
Much that they can no longer delight in their affinity;
Their passion for each other quietly waned;
Like a dead leaf silently blown by the wind;
They sat together in utter sadness;
And asked why and where they have gone amiss;
They looked into each other’s sad eyes -
Is it an ember emitting lights?
They whispered sincerely to the flickering glow;
Bright it became; and slowly it burned their deep woe,
They found their true gifts and gifted each other;
A warm encounter they thought was a bother;
The music of their bodies sang melodiously;
Without any word they expressed so delightfully;
“Forgive me”, as they exchanged glances
“Forgive me, too”, as they held their hands
Grateful lyrics of “thank you” echoes;
As they exchanged an impassioned kiss;
“Let us stay together and grow in love”
Reverberated as their hands tight-clasped;
This holy gift worth more than earth's gold -
God, they will never again withhold.
Now the wedding had drawn to a close the ceremony past
We found ourselves together and thankfully alone at last
We packed our bibs and bobs into suitcases very quickly
Rushed straight out the door though I felt a little sickly
The shining taxi was waiting to whisk us away
Airport then plane our trip was finally underway
On the plane to his charms I was not immune
This was going to be our magical honeymoon
Coughing and spluttering in the hotel I did lay
Could not get out of bed each and every day
To cruise rugged fiords our plan said next
So out of my sick bed I raised perplexed
This is not what I was thinking to expect
Romance and passion seemed to disconnect
On a small ship along the rugged coast we then did sail
Reveling in the sweet air with every breath we inhaled
At last I thought my dream has finally come true
Our honeymoon would be joyous and not blue
At the Close of the day to the hotel we wandered
Through this night our love would not be squandered
It was wishful thinking we were soon to realize
The honeymoon room had a bed but only single size
This is not what we expected when we happily set out
Dreams of intimate passion is what we thought about
The journey continued at a sedate pace
The wonderful views put a smile on our face
Sadly food poisoning hit me I was constantly sick
Sat hours in the toilets, hubby didn't’t take the Mick
I can now look back at my honeymoon from hell
Twenty four years married we are doing quite well
Our marriage is a promise from heaven above,
That we are bind with each other forever to love,
A promise not to give up when trials arrived,
A commitment into a journey,our goal to make it last.
For now we are both parents the pressure arise,
But the joy is more abundant for us to don't mind,
For our child is a gift, a treasure, an angel,
The reason that we have this most special bond.
Whenever we are weary and our faith is not enough,
We just prayed to God, to secure our hearts,
For we will keep our promise no mater how hard it seems,
We need to keep going, for our love to keep on surviving.
As we age, i can't guarantee I'll be lovable at all times,
For i know i have my shortcomings, not easy to handle out,
And i have to say i always love you more enough,
At times you are annoying,it is still you that i've been longing.
My love for you has grown stronger through the years,
Giving me more reasons to conquer all of this fears,
Just remember the day that i said " I Do" to you,
It was my heart's promise that i will stand by you.
The thing his wife regretted most:
Not putting poison on his toast.
For Susan’s Regret contest
I am his angel
That man that I adore
I'm the one he loves and would lay his life down for
The best kind of a husband , father , and son
I've always known, that he , was " the one "
If ever before was there a man so true ,
You'd have to be him , and he'd have to be you
It's hard being perfect , how hard ever I try
( you don't expect me to , shaking your head to sigh )
To deserve such a great love , I'm not sure of my worth
But by your side I'll be , until we leave this earth
Oh, the morning's Godly devotions
Amid ungodly emotions
Walking the earth, dampness soothing the sole
Bound to it with affinity and closeness
Yet heaven bound, tearing away from this concrete shoe
The coffin-drumming clods of clay
Covered with verge and fields of hay
A thin covering at that
As if the bountiful bosom is clad with a slip of silk,
A wisp of decency
Oh, the throes of fleshly woes
The shudder and fever of the soul's great war
Obsession, passion, thrills after fashion
The lashing of a scaly tail at the end of this mortal coil
Toil, toil, the gravel pit of survival
For what, mere existence?
The passions collide, asteroid striking planet,
Barren wasteland exploding in pits and pocks,
Craters round, dry as bone
Dry as love, old as valleys
Soundlessly, airlessly, lovelessly grey
Should I leave or should I stay?
Passion swells as sea's mighty tide
Thrusting the shore, thrusting, subside
Yet the shore is not moved, not even an inch
And on the moon there is no thirst to be quenched
No moisture, no thrust
No place, no lust
No sound to awake
No ear to hear the gong
of time tick and take
Our Love is sure, as sure can be sure.
Our love is pure, as pure can be pure.
Our love matures as we mature.
Our love endures as we endure.
As to being a spouse,
it's for good, I suppose.
Sun and Earth spinning, universes burning, inwardly yearning
Knowledge and learning, warmness in the darkness turning
Spirit and soul, love kept beside my bed in a bowl
A cold winters night and stove full of coal
By Rick Rucker
The sky seems somewhat bluer now,
The birds seem a little cheerier, somehow,
The grass looks a darker green,
More so than I have ever seen,
My disposition seems to be more pacific,
As to why, I cannot be specific,
I have thought about it, of late,
It must have begun with my Dream Date,
I had gone on a dating site,
Hoping to be someone’s Mr. Right,
I was hoping for a friend,
So that this crushing Loneliness would end,
I harbored, in my mind,
What I was hoping that I would find,
An impossibly perfect set of traits,
Which could not be found in twenty mates!
I tend to be a little “over the top,”
A flaw that I cannot seem to stop,
So, I went to meet, at our appointed place,
There stood a Goddess, with an Angel’s face!
I think we ate, I am not too sure,
I could hardly talk, there seemed no cure,
I realized at once,
That I must have seemed the perfect dunce,
Here, sitting across from me,
Was as perfect a being as there could be,
She was obviously too good for me,
Anyone in the room could see,
She had everything that I thought important in a mate,
And I was going to blow it on our first date!
We got through our meeting, and she finally left,
Leaving me standing there, bereft,
My head was all a-whirl,
I had just lost The Perfect Girl!
I could not, for a week, summon the guts to call,
Sure that she would not remember me at all,
But, to my surprise, she would give me another try,
Though I could not figure why,
All of this was months ago,
Perhaps, the rest of this you know,
We have bought a house, and moved our things,
Soon, we will be exchanging Rings,
We will be testing if we can,
Live happily ever after, as an Angel, and a Man!
The sound of freedom falls with the November rain
as I stumble back inside to my ball and chain
Once at the end of those days which made me a teen
My heart fluttered and danced with twirly beats, so keen!
In love I was and thought of the world as a flower
Blooming and blossoming in the hands of its gardener
Myself a mountain, a lush and lively one
Green with trees, home to the most beauteous swan
Pining to be united in a marital bond
I took a leap, the forbidden one, for my vagabond!
A fair one he was, with a tender heart
To laugh and live, he needed my start
My leap took to me to the end of the abyss
Now for a united bond I care not, except when I sip my koumiss!
I have a fear of drowning in deep waters, dark and cold;
I dream the waves are parted revealing Death's threshold.
I wonder, tremb'ling in my bed, if another life I've known;
Is there a body 'neath the sea, dissolved, bone of my bone?
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
We boarded the Titanic, her maiden voyage from the shore,
Just the two of us together, me and my husband Isidore.
Grandly cradled on the ocean within the ship of dreams,
Unaware an ice tow'r waited in the frigid, black extremes.
Roast squab and French ice creams, champagne and caviar
Were the first class luxuries, sailing on beneath the stars.
Near midnight the vessel shuddered as though wounded in the heart;
We waited captain's orders to load the lifeboats, disembark.
"Women first!" the crew commanded; older men could also go,
But Isidore would not depart, the truest gentleman I know.
He entreated me to leave the ship, but like Ruth of long ago,
I replied, "We've lived together many years. Where you go, I go."
We faced Death as we faced life, companions to the end . . .
Climbing the staircase to heaven, hand in hand with my best friend.
The story of Isidore and Ida Strauss is true; they were first class passengers on the
Titanic. Isidore was co-owner of Macy's. My connection to Ida is fiction.
The grand staircase on the Titanic was called "the staircase to Heaven."
June 22, 2014
One’s meanness and the other’s foolishness abet
them in arranging both a marriage and a bet.
Beneath the moon two lovers share their dreams.
Before daylight blinds an eternity of sunbeams.
© July 12, 2010
A bedroom should be pleasant
a place where futures are conceived
where wonderful dreams in their effervescence are woven and believed.
when dreams aren't loved, supported and nurtured,
they are cast aside along with the future.
weeds now grow instead of flowers,
rhapsodies of life to be,
has lost all of its wondrous powers.
it is at that time the bedroom is changed.
where windows once stood with freedom's form.
steel bars are now in the window frame and
the factory for dream weaving has been transformed.
the mill of fabrics has been shut down,
the thread has dry rot and can not bound.
there will be no more sewing of seams,
for love is dead, and so are the dreams.
imaginary, ha you think so?
steel bars of betrayal, oppression & humiliation ....
believe me because I know.
imaginary... ha.. you think so?
steel bars of heartache, tyranny, anguish and disbelief .....
believe me because I know.
imaginary ... facsimiles .... replicas.....
do you believe these steel bars not to be true ?
they are there ..... believe me, i'll give you a clue.
bedroom walls which could tell many tales,
now bleed and cry.
smashing freedom as do all jails,
with its boarders wondering why?
a million pieces of devastation...
dreams of love are now only mutilations.
a retardation of two hearts and souls.
hearts once joined are now at opposite poles.
so the bedroom turns from a happy place to sad.
with bars of steel that are eternally had.
bars of steel that destroy and breed hatred.
bars of steel that satan deems sacred.
victory can be gained over those bars of steel.
to conquer that demon, love must prevail.
dream dreams of love,
and sew with the strongest of thread.
weave your fabric of love,
the dream mill must be started again.
make room in your heart, soul and head......
for the dream weaver........................
the dream weaver returns triumphant again!
Marriage is not a game of just playing.
It is the fusion of two loving hearts.
Through the journey of holding the saying,
''Till death do us part.''
The start of new thing, the end of something
Let your turn comes, wait for your curtain's call
There is nothing to loose when you're waiting
''Marriage is for all!''
Now that I found my very other half,
A perfectly made mirror, genuine type
My heart and your heart can't be stop to laugh
''Love that's fully ripe.''
Leveling up our own relationship,
Surrendering and lifting all to God.
Sailing together using our 'LOVE' ship
''The feeling is glad!''
Now you're slowly walking in the aisle
Crying on every moments that pass by
Remenising how we made through the miles
''For the past, goodbye!''
Through the blessings of my parents and yours.
Hoping to live happily e'er after.
Legally combining to create new force.
''Living with laughter.''
Building family of our very own.
Wishing to recieve gifts from up above.
Enjoying each day together alone.
''Loving it's about.''
Exchanging our lovely promising vows.
I, as husband; you, as my only wife.
Fulfilling our God's heavenly commands.
''It's our SUM OF LIFE.''
He sees her; the door finally opens up.
His life flashes, from early start of a pup.
It allows for an inner dark contrast.
He regrets partying hard and running fast.
Seeing his silhouetted shapely beauty in white!
Still fighting feelings for her with all his might!
She begins her approach towards him.
With each step she takes he becomes grim!
He wants to yell and scream; try to stop her.
But on this good sunny day; he would be the bad weather.
He is on holy land and mad as hell!
Because she is moving like a turtle in its shell!
He is angry because it is making time slow.
He does not want to remember; for it will truly show!
He thinks of those times they made love.
They fit each other like a glove.
Oh, but there were always some serious issues.
His many vices became her daily box of tissues!
He is changed now because of what she did.
She put hammer to his nails; shutting that lid.
It worked he swore to her; “No more mischief!”
Between mournful sobs; he cried into his kerchief!
They hugged and she said; “We have a wedding to get through!”
“Yes my dear I know exactly what I must do!”
“Oh come on honey now; please don’t make it a big deal!?”
“As much as you've been there for me; this is one day I don’t want to feel!”
She says, “It will be fine; we can get through this together!?”
He says, “Let’s elope right now!? Forget all this; why bother!?”
She looks at him deeply; and thinks about it.
“I want the wedding ceremony! My name will be Mrs. Bennet!”
Vows are said; the church ceremony is done.
Now it is due time for the wedding reception.
The bridal bouquet is excitedly tossed!
The bride’s garter is then teasingly tossed!
That very first dance as husband and wife.
Whispering in each other’s ear; “This is for life!”
Everyone then gets silent in the room.
It is time to toast the bride and groom.
The mike is passed from hand to hand.
It then finally reaches the best man.
His words of endearment evoked such emotions.
The tears that flowed could have filled entire oceans.
Not one dry eye as they burst into applause!
And all this happened just because.
The best man knew the right words to say.
To peacefully send them on their way.
And as the evening finally starts to wind down.
The newly weds are speaking of leaving town.
“May I interrupt; and have a last dance with the bride!?”
“But it’s a slow jam; wait until the Electric Slide!?”
“What you don’t trust your best man with your wife!?”
“Come on man cut that crap out; I trust you with my life!”
He holds her close and whispers on the dance floor.
“Wished it was me when I saw you at the church’s front door!”
“But, but!”? “No don’t say a word just listen please!?”
“You are the only woman that has ever brought me to my knees!”
“But you did it in a kind, loving good way!”
“You saved me from me! I thank God every day!”
“When I was at my very worst!”
“It somehow helped quench your thirst!”
"We both benefited from you saving me!"
"It is why I would forever love thee!"
“You stayed with me all through the darkness!”
“Held me during my nightmares of madness!”
“I would wake up screaming in a cold sweat!”
“All you did was to hold me with no regret!”
“With such mutual caring, came vulnerability!”
“We can not continue this coital familiarity”
“As I watched you approach I began to falter!”
“Wishing I was instead the groom at the altar!”
“But it will cause us all one great big tragedy!”
“After this dance I walk away forever, and bow out gracefully!”
"I only want the best for you; this marriage would be solid as wood!"
"You will be well taken care of; way much better than I ever could!"
He then breaks the embrace telling her to remember this instance.
“TOO CLOSE A HEART MUST BE LOVED FROM THE DISTANCE!”
~ROGER CHAD SATNARINE 2015~
She is a ubiquitous presence
In the fabric of my life
And always seems to have the pulse
Of my oft times crazy life.
She knows just when to let me run
And when to apply the brakes
She celebrates my achievements
And is tolerant of mistakes
At night when plagued with nightmares
In search of a restful sleep
She can chase away my goblins
Even while she sleeps.
She has opened up a world for me
By turning living into life
She is my most valued treasure
My loving, beautiful wife.
“The Marriage Rose”
The marriage rose grows without any strain
It has seen joy in its blooms but also has seen pain
The beautiful bloom also has its thorn
And without hesitation a brand new bud is born
One bloom dies and another bloom grows
It’s a beautiful process and through eternity flows
Its pedals are soft and the fragrance is sweet
With the passion of time they fall calmly to our feet
Bewildered I give one to my new soul mate
The universe guides us to a new loving fate
Given through love that will never ever die
Love has its joy but will also make us cry
Now I only see blooms and the thorns are no more
With a love that blesses me right down to my core
And this is the question I most humbly pose
Will everyone see the beauty of a joyous Marriage Rose?
Young love blossoming though my life
One day soon she'll be my wife
we love today and never stop
Our true love will always pop
When we kiss i go crazy
Because i know you are my baby
i feel for you so fast in time
Now i know that you are mine
Your shy with me and never sing
but someday ill buy that ring(:
Hazel eyes glaze to my heart
I cant stand to be apart
But now i know were sure to be
because true love i really see.
You say you are sorry and want one last chance.
Can't you see that I am so weary of this dance?
Did the divorce papers not give you the clue?
I no longer want to be married to you!
What makes you think I would stay?
I am no longer your prey.
Your word I do not have to obey
For I am finally having my say.
My love I once had for you is deeply buried,
As you are no longer the man that I married.
You did nothing but give me grief.
So now our marriage is one that is brief.
Do I have to tell you a lover I have taken?
That our wedding vows I have now forsaken?
Can I be that cruel?
To the fire add more fuel?
Break your heart and your trust?
I surely will if I must.
I just want to end this marriage bizarre,
I no longer want to hear how sorry you are.