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Halloween Couplet Poems | Couplet Poems About Halloween

These Halloween Couplet poems are examples of Couplet poems about Halloween. These are the best examples of Halloween Couplet poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Couplet |

You Say- I Say

You say things that are really mean
I say that I'm still pretty lean
You say I'm fat and that's unfounded
I say I'm not fat, just well rounded
You say my big waist makes me look like a clown
I say that's not my waist, my chest fell down
You say I should be able to touch my toes with ease
I say you're right, if they were on my knees
You say my socks don't match, I should be more discreet
I say it's not my fault, I can't see my feet
You say I'm too heavy for my height, that's what you state
I say you're wrong, I'm just too short for my weight
You say I should weigh one eighty, no more
I say I'm five ten, I should be six four
You say next Halloween I should dress up as a mouse
I say I'll wear a window and go there as a house
You say I should get more exercise and try to shed a pound
I say that when I sit around, I really sit around
You say at the theatre you were embarrassed and didn't know what to do
I say it was because you sat in seat number three while I sat in one and two
You say I thought you were watching your weight
I say I am, I'm watching it inflate
You say being with me doesn't seem the same anymore
I say I'm still the same, just a whole lot more
You say you'd call if I were thinner
I say just don't call me late for dinner
You say we should work out at the gym down the street
I say we should get up and go out to eat.


Please note! A waist is a terrible thing to mind.


Details | Couplet |

Thief in the Night

I bought all the candy for Halloween night, 
Into the cupboard, it sat in plain sight

When later I looked, I just about flipped!
I saw empty wrappings, the bags were all ripped!

The treats were all missing,...so back to the store
I bought several bags, at least three or four.

Now back in my kitchen, I climbed on a chair
To hide them up high on a shelf that was bare...

Behind an old crock pot that he'd never use...
But would you believe, he discovered my ruse?!!!

The big night arrived and much to my grief
The candy had been eaten by that darn sweet toothed thief!!!!

The door bell was ringing, trick-or-treaters had come
I ducked out the back door, and fast did I run!!

Right back to the store, I flew like a witch...
The clerks heard me cursing, like a grouchy old b - - - -!

The store had no candy, sold out every piece
No Big Hunks, no Snickers, no Hersheys or Reese

I bought bags of apples.... gave them out in disgrace
Every kid on the block had disgust on his face

The next Halloween, I'm not buying ahead
I'm a last minute shopper for the candy, instead..

And to all you folks, who buy treats in advance
My advice to you all, is don't take such a chance!
Something else you should learn, from this frustrating tale...,
Next time you buy candy, attach some loud bells!!

------------    P.S.... (A Moral to the story, for an evening so gory).... 

                   He was licking his chops, while he had his sweet binge
                   But goblins were watching, ........and took their revenge....
                   That Halloween scrooge...Mr. Thief in the Night
                   He chipped his back molar, as he took that last bite!!





------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted for "Funny Spooks" contest
Sponsored by Carol Brown


Details | Couplet |

Like candy for strangers

  Like candy for strangers 
on Halloween night
she ties up her sweet words
in wrappers of light

 Expressions of happiness 
laced with a thought
of poignant remembrance
of childhood she caught

from reading your life
as you wrote it all out
in peppermint  sparkles
and chocolate doubt.

holding her apron,
     she captures the fall
of every confection
 and rewraps them all

 in yummy new sprinkles
 with strawberry swirls,
she flavors the taste 
for the rest of the world.


Details | Couplet |

Halloween hand me downs

I was the youngest kid of eight
Halloween was never that great
Orange clown shoes were too big
An old purple horrendous witch's wig

My sisters tutu I that wouldn't use
My brothers cape smelled of doo doo
Superman pants that didn't latch
And that makeup covered eye patch

That Halloween I knocked on this door
The lady was laughing and kicked the floor
Her husband then came around to peek
Then laugh so hard his knees got weak

She said "Oh honey, let's give him the lot"
He agreed, only if I posed for a snapshot
She said "you stay right there, don't move"
I took off so fast, I lost my clown shoes


Details | Couplet |

ANGELIC HALLOWEEN

    Halloween was coming and the angels thought they'd have some fun,
    Since they sometimes thought of dressing up before the Holy One.

    They all got together and decided to do just that,
    Dress up in devilish costumes...Surprise the Lord like some earthly college frat.

    Each one was to make his costume from the ethereal
    A very inexpensive and unusual type of material.

    Then, when the Lord was looking down at earth
    Don the costumes for some Heavenly mirth.
    
    It'll be a costume party for us here in our Heavenly abode
    Different from always wearing these white sophisticated robes.

    We'll have a good laugh and God will understand
    We're just having a laugh here in His Heavenly plan.
    
    The moment came, all the costumes had been made
    And when the Lord looked up, Heaven was a different shade.

    "Something is amiss, here." , He said in the shades of that red hue
     Perhaps I'll  bring Satan here, to find out if this is something new.

     It would be difficult to invite that guest into heaven you see
     As he had been banished for all the eons of centuries.

     But nothing is impossible for the Lord for He can do any feat
     And just when he was to summon Satan, the Angels all shouted

      "Trick or Treat"!


Details | Couplet |

Fastest Gun In The West

<                                      Now hold on there Tex !
                                        Let me get     dressed  !


                                        Let me saddle up my horse
                                        To trollop around this Halloween course


                                        Got on my chaps
                                        My spurs and cowboy hat


                                       Replica's of forty five's
                                       Riding on my hips very high


                                       With lasso in my hand
                                       This little cowboy has a plan
                                       

                                  
                                      So all you ghost and goblins
                                      It's candies bounty I'll be coming an robbing

                              
                                      And I'll be taking  loot for mummy
                                      And for my daddy who has a bigger tummy










                                                  Happy Halloween To All
                                   Especially little tikes who are so cute and small





Entry For 
Skat's 
Halloween Costume Contest
G.L. All
                                      

 
                                      
                                       


                                     

                                     
                                       


Details | Couplet |

HALLOWEEN GHOST


  When I was just a boy, growing up in Chicago
  My best friend was "Jimmy", who loved the monsters so!

  He was younger than me in more ways than one,
  But I enjoyed my time with him...we always had fun.

  One year for Halloween he bought monsters to build,
  Needing my help, we painted and glued and every cavity filled.

  There was Dracula, Frankenstein, the Werewolf, and the Mummy,
  Resplendently painted, delicious and yummy.

  Each was about 12 inches high
  With features that would make a little one cry.

  We set them in a window box with a black light behind
  Turned off the house lights for a real "Trick or Treat" find.

  Jimmy went out in to get his share of the goodies, too
  And when he came back, there was more than enough for us two.

  What really struck me that Halloween night,
  Was the five foot ghost, below the street light.

  Truly a sight to behold it was there,
  And to more than one person did it give a scare.

  Its white shaded body was like none I had seen
  With a face of a gorgon, I was ready to scream.

  It just stood there on the sidewalk watching the kids at the door
  You can believe that those kids always got more.

  I watched this ghost go up and down the street
  Watching the youngsters getting their sweets.

  Then, I realized, it was Jimmy's mom dressed in a sheet
  It covered her over, from her head to her feet.

  The mask that she wore was a scary one 
  But like the monsters in the window,  just done for fun.

  That fluorescent face I will never forget
  I didn't care for monsters...with little regret.

  Her costume rocked me to the core that night
  For the first time I saw it, I had a real fright.

  For I had never expected to see an adult
  Dress up in costume, much less the occult.

  So that is the Halloween that I remember the most
  When a lady I knew, dressed up as a ghost.


Details | Couplet |

A Halloween Couplet

Ghost and Goblins,
Witches in tow.

Who is the scariest,
I really don't know.

As the moon rises,
There are many surprises.

At my front door,
Hands out asking for more.

Just peek in, 
And reach in.

It's Halloween fare,
Take more if you dare.



Details | Couplet |

Yard Sale Syndrome

No time for coffee, as the dawn arrives....
I raised the shade. There's a crowd outside!
Hubby in his underwear, and gives them a surprise!
It's our first yard sale!!!  But, will we survive???
The mob takes over...I'm still in my slippers
But already sold some old hedge clippers!!

     Those folks just paid me a ton of money!!
     I could use some help..........Hey! Where's my honey??
     I swear...if he went back to take a nap
     I'll sell his priceless baseball cap!!
     Oh! They are looking at that wobbly table....
     "I'll help you load it,  Miss, if I'm able!"

          She grabs dog-eared, dusty, vintage books
          And one old crock-pot that still cooks!
          I show her some doilies, and a ragged Barbie
          And a costume for her Halloween parties?
          A rusty shovel, and a dented bucket
          And a fishing pole from old Nantucket

               I'm selling Ma's old apron, and some broken dishes
               A chipped glass bowl for all her fishes
               Aunt Edna's ugly painting, and her candle holders
               She lives down the street....hope no one told her!!! 
               One old bike for exercising
               Doesn't work....it's not surprising!



"What's the point?" our husbands mutter
While we fill the garage with all this clutter
I explain to him..."She buys mine, and I buy hers"
"Then, we won't need to shop the stores!!"
"Dear...don't you know the grass is greener?"
"OH LOOK!"  "That couple bought my vacuum cleaner!"

     Just then I point across the street!!
     Another yard sale.....and we both shriek!!
     He points at me and shakes his fist
     But I'll just ignore and toss a kiss
     And side by side I'm in a race...
     Who gets there first will buy that vase!!
     Whoopee!!!  I spy a broken chair...
     That other shopper gives a glare!
     So what it's broken?  Well, I can glue it!
     Just hope she doesn't beat me to it!


The point I'm making is simply this
This neighbor's junk became my bliss!
_______________________________________

For Skat's Yard Sale Contest:


Details | Couplet |

Zombie Car Lot

Last year we went shopping on Halloween
To find a new car for my lovely queen

Sadly when we arrived onto the lot
A ghastly salesman appeared on the spot

He thrust his hand in too close to my face
I shouted out, “Run before he gives chase.”

In the showroom we felt safe and secure
Until I was grabbed by the manager

Her face was pale and her eyes were all red
My wife thought she was of the walking dead

Her nails dug in my skin with a chilling grip
Yet, as she mumbled we gave her the slip

We ran over to a nice shiny car
But were waylaid by a man with a scar

He groaned and gave us a sales zombie stare
So I quickly uttered the good Lord’s Prayer

I pushed my wife in the car; then it locked
Plus I read the window and got sticker shock

I banged on the glass, “Hey honey let me in.
There are more salesmen approaching the din.”

She was helpless in there without a key
I had to act fast; it was up to me.

I yelled, “We’ll take it,” to one of the curs
Then was hauled in to the loan officer

They wrenched every fact from my weary life
I had to placate to rescue my wife

I then heard a hushed scream out on the floor
They must have gotten to her through the door

I signed the papers, though at a high price
Then dashed between two guys as cold as ice.

I shoved salesmen aside and joined my hon
But slammed the door on a big warty thumb 

The sales zombie shrieked and quickly pursued
Though with his hand wedged, he was tough to elude

We then sent that sales zombie right on his a$$
Just before our car smashed through the plate glass

When my wife asked how much was on the loan
I went into shock and drove lifelessly home.

For Halloween Poem contest     David Fisher on 10/30


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