Mean Joe Greene number seventy-five
kept the Pittsburgh Steelers alive
was a solid wall on that frontline
and sacking the quarterback was fine
the Steel Curtain was solid back then
in the seventies they’d always win
that was the decade of the Steelers
take your rookie card to a dealer
and maybe it is worth some green
never forgetting mean Joe Greene
Quizmasters often test mentalities,
by asking folks to name pluralities,
of things of many different sorts.
Like, soldiers might be called 'cohorts'.
There are 'flights' of geese and jets and stairs,
my socks are sometimes found in 'pairs'.
A young girl's curls could hang in 'bangs',
and crooks might hang about in 'gangs'.
Such gangs could join to form a 'mafia',
alas that only rhymes with 'raffia'.
Apes, as you'd know, can make a 'shrewdness',
could rednecks joined become a 'rudeness'?
And though Collingwood fans are two a penny,
more than one is just 'Too Bloody Many'.
Unless you have been in the same pub or football ground with Collingwood fans, or on the same train or tram or continent, you will never understand.
Switching channels, trying to stay on top
Mannings and Favre are the cream of the crop
Afraid to miss a single great play
Is this how a lady should spend her Sunday?
Vikings fans stand up and cheer
Purple and gold are winning this year
Look like dem Saints gonna 'Brees' (Understood?)
No more bags, no more 'Ain'ts" (Better knock on some wood!)
Not much success for the Tampa Bay Bucs
But faithful fans are still wishing them luck
The Giants appear to be bouncing back
Eli and team mates try to regain their track
Great quarterbacks like Luckman and Tittle
Let's hope our Giants remain "fit as a fiddle"
Touchdowns and field goals get fans outta their seats
While I scream and applaud, my cheerleading repeats
Reviews and replays are part of this game
As great football legends, their names shall remain
Let's get ready to watch game of football.
It's the number one game to watch in the fall.
Choose a team that will be a winner.
Watch the game just before dinner.
Oklahoma sooners is my team who's yours?
Many thanks to the football fans who contributed, including Linda-Marie Bariana, Karen
O'Leary, Tim Ryerson, Matthew Annish and Teresa Skyles (the Sooner fan!).
CAN YOU SPEAK WOMAN?
I can speak French and sometimes Chinese
I can also speak cat with some ease
When he miaows at me as he goes
I mimic his call and he knows
When the dog barks I reply
Even the horse and I see eye to eye
But I can’t speak “woman”
It’s beyond the speech power of a man.
I can’t talk for hours about shoes
And discuss the merits of mauves or blues
Or share the humour of how pink bows
Don’t go with green pillows
And go all weepy over Meryl Streep
Or wax lyrical over some punk-rock creep
Or persuade some guy to discuss flowers
Rather than the size of the nuclear powers
.. . . . so she said. . . . so then I said. . .
And she whispered. . . . and her face went red. . . .
No it’s impossible to spend hours on the phone
I’d rather sit watching football all alone
It’s futile me trying to pretend
An interest in what gift to send
Or remember birthdays wi th accuracy
Such a task would drive me crazy
God save me from female speech
Let me speak “man”, I beseech
Just let me sit alone and grunt
Or maybe shoot, fish, and hunt
And talk to the dog about football facts
Or maybe to the car while I wax.
What Am I leading Up To.
You often will wonder what phrases mean,
Like a little lean or maybe even green;
You should try one on for size,
Or to me it might be a big surprise.
Things are turbulent underneath, not on surface;
Performance was like that of a three ring circus;
You should see me in my great auto gravure;
Compared to today was simple, plain and pure.
Run was made right down the middle
By player found to befit as a fiddle;
There might be some Obama trauma;
Should have ended with death of Osama.
Now new Congress is all nestled down
And word has been spread all over town,
Mighty Seahwaks met there greatest goal,
Which was to end up in the Super Bowl.
Sounds like they are starting a new trend;
When game will be tied at the end;
After so hard each one of them did try,
Pass landed in receiver's hands sent from the sky.
From sky view camera all of it could be seen;
Every player looked like a bouncing bean;
Outright owner whose first name is Tall Paul
Ended up with a big trophy and a game ball.
James Thomas Horn
Not Be Another
No matter what may be Patriot's Play scheme,
None if it ever would spoil Seahawk's dream
And what appears to me to be amazing
Is having a football that people were hazing.
What unpleasant things to a football could you do?
Making it take a bounce not known to be true,
Or suppose something to football you applied
Which made ball slick after it had dried.
How about discovering a doctored up baseball;
Started to curve and then downward would fall,
After surface someone started to scratch;
Maybe for me they might make up a batch.
What if my basketball was underinflated?
And for a while longer we all had waited;
Ball now was much narrower each shot I took
Even if a free throw or could be a hook.
Who me my friend have an unfair advantage;
To my cruddy character apply a long bandage.
And when in Super Bowl, Series or World Cup,
Should never again be another cover up.
James Thomas Horn, Retired Veteran
PS. Check out military memories above.
Patriot's Play Scheme
Should I make love or leave well enough alone?
Even though may be young teen or fully grown;
My decision, what things will it be affected by?
Nothing works out no matter how hard I try.
My life bottomed out and became abysmal,
Yet I will struggle and continue on still;
Even often by bad things I am bothered,
And may have hooped much and also hollered.
What must I make out of all this musty mess?
So I can be sure to obtain and reach success
After many great throws my balls would land
Exactly where I eagerly, earnestly had planned.
On one dastard day luckily learned how to dance;
In much more time, appearing to be a spance
I religiously became such a romantic soul
After one shot ball (Eagle) ended up in a hollow hole.
My worried mind became such a heavy load,
And I humorously decided to hit a long road
To recovery being that God and of course I
Won't use footballs having air in short supply.
Passes and drives landed which went so far;
After pretentious putts I made ended up par;
Personal sports psychology became prophetic;
Patriots play scheme seemed to be so pathetic.
James Thomas Horn, Retired Veteran