What It Is Like To Smile

It’s a fake smile. It’s being 3 months old and having a mother in jail. Being 2 years old and being confused whether or not you have a mother. Being 17 and finding out the woman who gave birth to you has kept you a secret from everyone she knew. It’s a real smile. It’s being 6 and in the adoption process for a new mother. It’s opening the letter from court saying you officialing have a mother in your life. It’s being 17 and having your mom brag about your every accomplishment to every single person. It’s a fake smile. It’s being 12 and having your innocence taking away from you. Taken away from you by someone who had no business touching you. When people ask why you don’t have a boyfriend yet and you have to pretend you really want one. It’s a real smile. It’s your whole life when you having caring people all around you. Loving you when you need it the most. When you are sitting on your bed crying or at Christmas dinner laughing so hard you’re crying. It’s being depressed and having to plastering a fake smile across your face when people are around. It’s being overjoyed and thankful and shining your smile when no one is looking.