What Annoys You

WHAT ANNOYS YOU? Downstairs neighbor, whose rabbits eat most of my marigold And a good deal of my lettuce and spinach too, Even though I have often, calmy and collectedly, told Him to try to keep control of his livestock or he will rue. Other neighbors fixing their floors in the apartment above me And they don’t seem to realize that the a.m. is quarter to two; Or allowing their dog to howl all night cos he wants to pee. People with big dogs who say don’t worry he won’t touch you When what they really mean is that he won’t touch them. Women pushing buggies filled with dog-ugly babies, Who insist on telling me how cute they are, while I hem And haw, and feel like asking if their dogs have rabies. Café proprietors with flies feeling free to buzz the sandwich tray And exlore the rim of each cup before it gets used by me: And then these proprietors expect me to smile and pay - When (ignoring food poisoning) I feel I should eat there for free. Yes, I am patient, though people are annoying in so many ways; While I am free of all aggressive or irritating habits - As my wife will testify in the court in several days When I will defend the fact that I killed the neighbour’s rabbits. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . Written for Natalie Fllikkema’s Contest “Cellphones in the sauna...What annoys YOU?”