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The Feast

Tongue soaked in tasty red Painful water; it blots the bed Vampires are at feast Doom strikes whoever sucks least Bursted veins, brawled roars Shattered windows paving soars Of beasts; two dead couples lays Tickling death in its night rays Hunger exhumes lost appetites Like woods to termites Carcasses left for vultures It was a night of less surfeit pleasures!

Copyright © | Year Posted 2013




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Date: 9/17/2013 11:37:00 AM
I like your subject matter. I'm a huge Anne Rice fan and was picturing a scene from one of her books while reading. I think the piece would flow better if you tightened up your rhymes and evened out the beats. Play around with your wording a bit. Cool piece, though :)
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Book: Reflection on the Important Things