The Bloke Who Sells the Bait

Another long weekend’s upon us and we’re ready, set to go, To get amongst the bream again, along the river Tambo. Our adrenaline is rushing and we’re really bloody keen, To celebrate with fishing while, we’re toasting to the queen… And when arriving Friday night, We were told the fishing’s great, When we asked for information, From the bloke who sells the bait. “They’re really biting well” he say’s “Up in the Lucerne patch, And if you’re using sandworm, then they’re not too hard to catch.” … he had a stack of sandworm boxes sitting on the freezer lid… “So would youse like a box of sandworm?” And naturally we did. “That’s five dollars each” he say’s to us, so we ‘cough’ up the dough. Then at seven in the morning, we’re having our first ‘throw.’ The bream were biting well all right; but they’re all undersize! And somehow our impression was; this bloke was telling lies… So we’re back again at lunchtime, With nothing on our fishing plate, Where we got a relocation, From the bloke who sells the bait. “Perhaps” he said “They’ve moved along, up somewhere near the Cliffs. So the little ‘blighters’ stole your bait? (Then with arrogance he sniffs) … there was not a box of sandworm left, and so he let us know… He’d heard reports from locals that “Its prawn that was the go!” We lined up opposite the Cliffs, where the Tambo isn’t wide, Baiting up with prawn and casting near the other side, Where every now and then we’d see the movement of a ‘tip,’ Then winding in we’d find we’d been, the victims of a ‘strip’… And by the time the sun went down, We had nothing on the slate, So asked for an explanation, From the bloke who sells the bait. “Well I’ve got to say I’m puzzled!” he said, as he scratched his head. “Perhaps the bream have ‘schooled’ along the Metung Road instead, But I’m sure you would hook plenty up around the ‘Cliffs’ you know. Maybe it’s shrimp and isn’t prawn, that has bream on the go.” “Another five bucks thanks” he said, and then on Sunday morn, Shrimp attracted never-ending bites; but you know I could have sworn, Word had traveled through the Tambo for the nursery of bream To gather at the Metung road where getting hooked is slim… So we went back one final time, To set this ‘bludger’ straight. We then got this indication, From the bloke who sells the bait. “It could be you’re unlucky with your timing fishing here.” And then from the ‘Baitman’s Bible’ he recited loud and clear, As he gave his explanation with a glimpse of fleeting sorrow; “Well, big bream were biting last week and they prob’ly will tomorrow.” ©2000 Lindsay Laurie