The Barnacle On My Bum

She was a barnacle on my bum Following me around town getting jealous if I talked to another girl even if they were 91. I didn't want to hurt her because she was so sweet But every time I turned around she'd be there on the street Some times she used to frighten me I'd have nightmare in bed at night She was like a heat seeking missile and she had me in her sites. She had lips like Mick Jagger and was always kissing me And all because I complimented her once and bought her a cup of tea Now she's besotted and wants to marry me. I can't see what she sees in me I try to avoid her like the plague I was scared to leave the house But had to and be brave. I had to always be on the watch Like a hunting cat be as agile as a ballerina and as stealthy as a rat. But then she found a boyfriend I was happy as can be Because he now had a barnacle on his bum Phew! and not me. Peter Dome.copyright.2014.march.