That's It, I'M Running For President

When it's all said and done When it rolls around next Think I'll make a run For president From the fiasco I've seen From Trump and Hillary They both made it look Rather easy I'll promise them this While giving them that And never admit When I leave out the facts I'll wear an American flag pin So I'm not penned communist While promising that And giving them this I'll scream at some At the top of my lungs And when asked of my past I'll play it dumb I will promise to free Those in poverty If they would just kindly Give a donation to me I will shake all the babies And kiss a few hands Wait...can I have a do over On what I just said? I will kiss all the babies And shake a few hands There...that's more like it Darn you auto correct! I'll promise it all Without skipping a beat The straights will say Yay While the gays dance in the street I'll perfect the one liners Like, it's the economy stupid Then ship jobs to China When no one is looking When asked what I've done I'll avoid the question Until eyes start to glaze And boredom sets in I'll go to war If one need be fought Or take out a loan If peace can be bought So in another four years When all this goes bad The run for president I'll throw in my hat Cause if it can be done By Hillary or Trump Then it can be done By most anyone