Somewhat Repetitive Fickle Foolish Footles

Overweight law enforcement official: Whopper Copper Nickname for a rather pudgy Charles Dickens Character: Whopper Copper Overweight Janitor: Whopper Mopper Big fat lie: Whopper Whopper Lockjaw: Chopper Stopper Highway Patrolman pulling over a Hell’s Angel: Chopper Stopper Louis XVI banned the Guillotine and thus was nicknamed the Great and Royal: Chopper Stopper Church secretary to parishioners in a confession line: ‘Lunch break! In which time you certainly may NOT’: Bother Father Shocking and irreverent response to the priest's query from an obviously irritated and frustrated parishioner who had the misfortune of being the last in line: ‘Do I wanna make a what?? Hell’s Bells!...Don’t even’: Bother, Father! Spaced-out church officer: Freekin’ Deacon Grouchy, grumbling and humiliated congregation member to the officer who dropped the communion tray on her lap: Freekin’ Deacon! Elderly church officer forced to depend upon Depends: Leekin’ Deacon Postscript: Sadly, the last three verses refer to the unfortunate soul mentioned above. The pastor was forced to accept the deacon's resignation for drug abuse, improper behavior and dress code violations because he insisted on constantly tugging and yanking his suit coat down in a futile attempt to conceal his rather puffy and swollen hindquarters which of course made his pants far too short, exposing his sagging socks and rather pale, boney calves...On a brighter note, he was hired by FEMA to council and assist stranded flood victims after the water had receded to a safe wading level...