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Salt Juice and Steam

Jack Jordan Avatar Jack Jordan - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Salt Juice and Steam which was written by poet Jack Jordan. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Salt Juice and Steam

There are times when my life has focus, 
when my lover finds the string 
tying me to earth, 
a thread of varying gauge and color, 
stretching to the near horizon. 

Yet I’m empty, heavy, on the edge of tears,
where depth and joy and pain leak away
(hold my breath don’t breathe I’ll lose it 
like the night long ago when I was drunk 
and cried helpless helpless). 

I’ve become gray and bent,
a twisted structure 
retrieved from a pool 
of salt juice and steam,
knowing I can’t have the whirlwind again,
that tasty center,
that unknowing nothing.

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  1. Date: 2/3/2013 10:21:00 AM
    I enjoy the imagery of the 'string' tethering you to earth, in the 1st stanza....found the rest of the poem to be depressing, but depressingly well-written. Ha! I see from your reply in the comment below, that you are moreso describing the past(I think).

    Jordan Avatar Jack Jordan
    Date: 2/3/2013 10:28:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Yes, the poem was about the past. My life has changed now, and for the better. However, I do seem to write a lot about dark times. I need to lighten up. Thanks for the comment.
  1. Date: 1/27/2013 6:53:00 PM
    I thought you captured what many of us feel sometimes very well, but we must look forward to the red sunrise tomorrow and Washington Irving said it best that the knowledge we leave to someone else is the best thing we can do with our life. Here's to yesterday!

    Jordan Avatar Jack Jordan
    Date: 1/27/2013 7:03:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Fortunately, I don't feel what the poem describes very much these days. Somehow being old is it's own reward. Thanks for your reply. Jack