Recoiling, I'M Beyond Useless

Put a sail to me, I'll cross the seven seas I'll just sink with the ship that hasn't carried me that far it's battered and dilapidated but I'm too lackadaisical to try and fix it who do I appear to be do I appear to be someone who would command a person to choose life over death do I look like a marriage counselor I'm just a stupid boy still trying to find a way out of confusion I'm sick of myself, sick of everything I'm not a machine, don't try to perfect me Society has me hanging from a rope above treacherous waters I'm slipping from a world I created to someplace under a different reign I was born different, I'm meant to be different not be stuck in an assembly line of people that look assembly factored made I'm in a rage; I hate myself I've been falling under a radar, becoming a hypocrite criticizing a group of people but I've been behaving like one I'm just a speck in the middle of the world though I'm being viewed as I've been cloned ten times I've never been married, no not yet I'm founding that I sit up at night giving advice on what to do when I just want to fade out and sleep is the whole world against me I don't have the power to bring someone back from the dead I don't have the heart to choose for someone else What am I supposed to say to keep someone from taking their life yet I find myself doing the best I can the best I can for another person I love to be buried six feet under I feel completely useless I feel beyond useless What kind of man am I I'm so far away too far away for my own good I'm going insane everyday, everyday that passes by yet another person harasses and abuses my whole world, the only light in my darkness a love I can never let go and I can't do anything at all... I can't do anything at all... Though I squirm inside my skin the anger boils in my blood my fists keep recoiling every second and all I want all I need is a moment one simple moment to punch a hole in every wall I see I hate the world I live in but I'm too restricted by an invisible loaded gun that keeps going off just to have another order that tries to conform my mind to surrender but I'm a fighter Tears don't matter anymore I've cried my whole life up until now Now my eyes are a dried well So I'm just sinking within myself so tie a sail to me, I'll be the mast I'll sail across the seven seas but I'd stop halfway sailing one because a whirlpool is taking me out of the light of the sun...