Our Love

Our Love (written in the style of spoken word) My world eclipsed itself in the shadow of your moon In the fading of your breath, the gasp of your final death blacked out to me was the image of your last re-birth Visions of your glory blind to my infantile sight I cried out to God "take me lord, for to take my light is to leave me unto darkness." Crippled and shamed I crawled to my side and wept to feel the fingers of your memory sweep my hair from my cheek As a child I raged that all he left of you for me was the ghost of a life losing vitality in time The world was numb but for the pain and I rolled in the evanescence of it wrapped like a proud shawl of mourning that in this right I would sacrifice and pay dignitary to what I failed you in If I could have died, I would have born your stripes I would have carried your cross and welcomed the nails home that all I could have of you was the agony of your leaving... My Mother I felt your tears too as I felt in them in your fading I felt the trails of your sorrow as you wept for your baby Just as your comforts were love and despair in one to me (for how could I know your life lived in me) your regrets were mine misery then my comprehension of a Mothers love was foriegn. Your presence drove me mad Your death erased my dreams and your life fed my memories. Some where the blackness of years numbned-greyed and I breathed Some where in a moment I could not name your presence gave me stregnth as I accepted the world I now lived But the majic of the moon faded, the faith you gave me staled the world spun because God commanded but my heart beat because you breathed it God is a jealous God, I whispered Is my loss my punishment for loveing her the more? The tears trickled to moisture and days cycled into years and I listened to your whisper, feather kisses tucking me to sleep, some where in the depths of the self I did not know, you loved, you prayed You wept for my loss and yours, but you loved you held me at night when I longed for you you cheered for my each new step and when I first held my son I heard in my heart your first words to me " My baby, My Baby' so then I understood and gave them to him In learning this new love of my life I began to understand not your death, but your life, your love, and why you still hold me and miss me as I miss you but I hear you, I hear him and I see my son I thank you both