Newbury, Berkshire

Berkshire is a landscape Of beauty and perfection Unless you live in Newbury You'll cling to this perception Even though this town Seems quaint unto a stranger He is yet to analyse the average locals behaviour A rich man races horses Then drives back to his village A newburian's quite different He'll sniff, he'll lie, he'll pillage The highstreet displays character Cafés, shops, all humble Yet despite the architecture Walk 10 minutes, you'll take a tumble Because instead of affluence And you'd hardly be surprised There Are inbreds and their friends On meow and bicycles, looking for a fight Or boasting of their business How on a bench they reproduced Paired their genes in a manner vile Another generation of no use The girl speaks in tones so shril The boy brags of being arrested She didn't take her pill And he got his genitals tested Their parents are no different It's why their youngens are this way They yell from withered snouts Melodramatically dismayed But if you heard the content Of their hostile cries Why, you'd understand There's nothing in their lives And it's all because Newbury is really a shithole, you either leave here or rot here