My Old Bosses Funeral

MY OLD BOSSES FUNERAL by JOHN M. ARRIBAS Went to the funeral of my old boss After several speakers I was at a loss Who was this person they were eulogizing Kind words and praise was so surprising I knew him well for many, many years Despised by family and also his peers He was a tough boss that never praised The toil of his workers, most thought him crazed One speaker after another had bountiful praise They must be mistaken or in a mental daze Like I said I knew him well Being around him was a living hell His ex wife had nothing to say His two daughters couldn’t make it today His son sent a card but forgot to sign It said” hi mom” are you having a good time? I had an eerie feeling throughout the service These lauding comments were making me nervous I had to make sure I was in the right place Walked up to the casket and stared at his face I had to touch him to see if he’s cold Lipstick and rouge made him look old Underneath the makeup he was turning gray Get him underground don’t wait another day Sure enough the old codger was dead But I couldn’t believe the plaudits said He was a bitter psychotic misanthrope He was cheap a bigot a total mope He was intolerant abusive and never approved To belittle and disarm was his every move The praising went on like a marathon It sounded as if they’re sorry he’s gone It must be that he had more than one side They’re talking about Dr. Jekyll I knew Mr. Hyde BOSS’S FUNERAL (2) Later I learned what the praise was all about He left a fortune for his rep to dole out Total discretion for his rep to give away To anyone that had something real to say Everyone here and others previously chosen To say a few words about the recently frozen They all praised and offered exaltations Expecting a big payoff for their commendations But when the will was officially opened Not a thing awarded to those who had spoken Instead everything was willed to his son Cause he was best to continue his fathers run Of all of my kin and friends it was easy to see My son is a son of a ***** just like me So he gets my wealth and also my genes He’ll succeed using unscrupulous schemes When its his time to turn from ecru to gray He can expose the hypocrites as I did today