My Idiom Oneliners Part 2

I noticed that the grass was always greener on the other side, as I made my way to the 18th hole and practiced my drive. As I zip lined across with the greatest of ease, I finally noticed for the first time the forest for the trees. That evening I again had to face the music, with baton in hand I tried not to lose it. If my cat really has nine lives, why is he still roadkill up on the drive? I finally threw in the towel as my washing machine let out a hungry growl. I'd finally become a basket case as I stood before the judge with a can of mace. We were all in the same boat, trying not to resort to cannibalism and to stay afloat. I bit off more than I could chew, realizing this after the eating contest as I hurled and puked. Before they went down the skiing slope, I told them to break a leg like a mindless dope. The other day I finally went out on a limb, all the while thanking God I am pretty slim. Haste makes waste unless you procrastinate. They told me to keep my chin up or the the wound like a volcano would erupt. Once more I knocked on wood, reading the "doorbell out of order" sign where I stood. My parents always told me I had a one track mind, as I walked along the railroad tracks and read the railroad station sign. They started dropping like flies having ignored the no fly zone sign.