I Fight To Live In This Moment With You

I have broken past the point of breaking, My world shattered. I said I would never trust again, I could never! Then one day I met you, everything that held me fell away. My broken heart put together, my fears still there. This time though it was different! I needed nothing from you, but wanted to make you happy! Making you happy made me ok again! I never intended to get so close, to fall! But my awe at feeling again was too much to bear. I was tired of not feeling, being numb to all others. I let you get to me, past were anyone else ever got. Something in me breaks lose when you’re around! You are my weakness and my strength. You are my pain and my happiness. Never before has anyone had that control. All I want is you! Perhaps what made the difference? I know that time runs fast, it is gone before it has even passed. I live in the moment, but now I know there is a clock ticking away. How could I let go, even knowing someday you won’t be here. Too soon! I want it all, go to sleep with you, wake up to you. I want to build with you, even though I know that building with you will just crumble when you’re gone. Then I will stand alone in the rubble I knew was coming! I keep trying to break it apart now, to stop the extra hurt. To never have more memories; to close my heart before it’s no longer there. My faith shaken because I don’t want to be alone without you. But my hope is what keeps me there. Because I want the laughter, the anger, the tears, and the love of being with you. I want everything I can get and hold it dear. Do I let go now and not live in the day that it is, like I demand of myself, Or do I hold on and enjoy the moment as is and hope to heaven that my memories keep me. My world shattered once, but I didn’t break as a person. I faltered and I got back up. But this, this will break me! If my memories don’t keep me; My faith and hope will disappear. My love will never again shine. I will lose my fight! And yet I fight to live in this moment with you!