Eyes Closed

I close my eyes and pretend that you are still here, I prented that everyone is getting along and no one fights. I open my eyes and nothing escaptes but a single tear. I put the mask back on as I go into the lights. As I open my eyes the reality of it all hits me so hard, There is no longer happiness or perfection around. I put the cages back pu around my heart, it's my only guard, The world is spinning around me I hear so many sounds. I hear chaos, heart break, I can't do it so I close my eyes again, I see a pefect family, I see us all laughing and having fun, Then it's all gone and sadness fills the place happiness had once been, As I open my eyes I want nothing more than to run. Our family is falling apart and they don't even care, I am losing the ones that are always supposed to love me. I don't want them, I want you to be there, You always loved me no matter what the case may be. As they continue to hurt me I push them further away, Once again I close my eyes and pretend that you're here. You wouldn't stand for this, why couldn't you stay? I keep my eyes closed for opening them is what I fear.