Explosion

I guess bottled up emotions don't make good appetizers the holidays come and go. then the bomb goes off you feel empty and self-hate you want your innate feelings to be over It hurts more because its from someone you love someone who raised you it's not fair that I never cared I was being honest isn't that what you taught it's the best policy but I guess this is the 1% of the time's you were wrong I'll be gone soon and I'm sorry that I made you feel this way I was only preparing you for what you're going to have to deal with in a year. I guess I was too selfish to tell you how depressed I am I don't want you to know because in my own weird way I care about you more than I care about me. It doesn't look like it I put on a facade of happiness but my inner feelings rotate and revolve a horrible life that no see's I guess one day you will understand I'll tell you all my little explosions and hope that you can help me detonate all of them. I love you Mom