"Every time, countless stares, they try to peer into my mind.
Every single time, I am so tense, I cannot relax and unwind.
The painful judgment unleashed down upon my own flesh and blood,
Who is right, who is wrong, who is guilty and who is strong. Who is fit to rise from that which dirties our hands and body, the mud.
I want to get away from you, but I fear you not.
I want to watch you suffer as I rise and you rot.
Do not mistaken me, I truly am just a simple, regular girl with nothing to live for.
But that means that I can go to such lengths to grab your heart and crush your core.
Accusing me, I was just fine with that,
But now bringing down my entire family? You scummy, shameful rats!
Throughout my childhood, all I wondered was "why?"
Now, I don't care, when you cross my mind, I chant, "just die."
Blaming us for what?
Shunning us because we fought?
Your manipulation of our minds will NOT be tolerated.
I am the watch dog of this family and will not let you belittle and derate.
I don't need your help and I promise to be better than you,
This is one of the few reasons I will continue living and that fatal day you shall rue.
You stole my childhood, you made me cower in fear, you broke my already fragile soul...
Therefore, allow me to dispose of that heart tainted to the level of corruption, the place where your heart was placed will become a jet black hole.
How sweet shall it be to see that that fragile, odd and silent girl you ignored or insulted,
Will be the end of you and all for she, for ten years and still going, has cultivated,
A garden of thorny roses, beautiful in all colors and tainted with your scarlet blood so saccharine,
That truly this is not a heavenly virtue but a mortal sin.
And yet, perhaps your demise shall not satisfy the craving I so dearly wish to be relieved of.
Perhaps you should continue to live and watch me become the things you wish you could be, but for money's sake, could not do and afford to love.
But that day will come and revenge will be sweet.
It will surely be the sweetest thing I could ever hope to eat~!
May 1st, 2013; 5:13 pm