Dead Weight

Time is wearing thin as the patience in my head. Ideas arrive for me to try and put this stress to bed Love for all that’s good is supposed to be a given But I’m chastised for the things I’ve said And stoned for how I’m livin’ All things corresponding on this earth You bet have met some friction Embrace and accept for what it’s worth Instead of treating it as an affliction Each and every breathing life, must come to an instant end. Eliminate dead weight with a knife and roll with genuine friends. ~JSLambert

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Carolyn Devonshire

Date: 6/12/2011 2:15:00 PM

Joey, I forgot about the eight-line rule. You could use just the last two verses and say something like "Diversity of stones have met some friction" in line two and "Instead of treating 'THEM' as an afflication" in line four. I'm pretty sure the eight-line rule will be a big factor in judging, but the last two verses could stand alone. Just some thoughts. Really love this poem! Carolyn

Carolyn Devonshire

Date: 6/12/2011 10:57:00 AM

How right you are, Joey. We have to live in our own manner and ignore those who criticize. Genuine friends are supportive without expecting you to change. Very profound message in this poem. Hope you've entered it in the "stones" contest because it reads like a winner! Love, Carolyn

James Foulk

Date: 6/12/2011 10:41:00 AM

you know there is always some one worse than you, a saying i am sure you have heard. but it is true. I was lucky to have a great mom raise me, but no dad around until later. i had it rough at times, but made it through life this far and you can to. when my first marriage ended i though that was it, life is over for me, then i met my second wife and things got better. I had a lot of problems in school at times, things will get better, don't give up.thank you for reading Bashful Sun.