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Crimson Rain

On a still...ancient horizon, Massive dragon wings emerge, To the atmospheric battlefield. Where two legendary beasts, Clash for the love...of a dragoness. A battle of mythic proportions, Of two stonily serpents in the sky. Only three dragons remain, The two wary warriors, And the dragoness they fight for. The flap of enormous wings, Thunders the air abroad. The fire in the sky illustrates, That the battle has begun. Fierce deafening roars, Rape the quiet Delphi skies. In a solemn brave attempt, To win the dragoness’ heart. She rests...nestled in the mountains, For the winning warrior’s return. Strident screams pierce the heavens, From the vicious violent brutality. Aggressive attacks resonate, Vibrating her lair of stone, As she shivers in despair and wonder. Sharp talons pierce the scales, Shredding the tissue of life. Effervescent mists spray, Staining the clouds with gore. A thud hits the landscape, And her attentive attention reacts. Waiting with complete ambition, A second thud thumps the landscape. Curious eyes creep from the cave, She wrestles with the thought of extinction, As both...her warriors are slain, Laying lifelessly...in a crimson rain.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2009




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Date: 3/23/2010 8:02:00 AM
Yes, a definite 10- with a sad twist at the end. Loved it, going to faves.
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Date: 1/11/2010 10:37:00 AM
Congratulations on your win in Constance's Anything Goes Contest One Raul. Love,Carol
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Date: 1/11/2010 12:34:00 AM
What a story and the images are so vivid. The flap of enormous wings. I could actually hear that sound. Have you seen Avatar yet? You will love it. Congratulations on your win in Constance's contest, Raul and thank you for once again sharing your remarkable talent. Love, Lainie
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Date: 12/10/2009 12:13:00 PM
This one is a complete 10, you list so many vivid descriptions and still manage to deliver a great story line. You are a brilliant writer.
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Date: 12/2/2009 9:19:00 AM
what an amazing write raul... extinction is a problem many animals face today..... the battleing dragons creating "crimson rain" a greatr visual. its refreshing to read your freeverse work!
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Date: 12/1/2009 5:52:00 PM
Full of wonderful imagery and great flow. Peace and love, audrey
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Date: 11/30/2009 12:54:00 PM
And who said you only write haiku's..wow, Im enchanted with this story.. Well done. BG
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Date: 11/30/2009 12:30:00 PM
Love the gore staining the clouds and how the dragoness sees the aftermath raining down on the landscape. The thought of blood raining down is captivating and sheer genius. This supersedes simple writing ability. Your talent shines creatively in your work.
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Date: 11/29/2009 11:47:00 PM
Congrats on your success in Debbie's contest Raul.Rgds Brian
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Date: 11/29/2009 8:11:00 PM
I enjoyed reading this mythical poem,i can picture "The Delphi" in Greece,the dragons fighting for the dragoness,its a pity they both ended lifeless in blood(in a Crimson Rain-loved the title and the end),,The dragoness was left alone..sad ending indeed yet great work i really enjoyed reading it...get more of these Raul--Charma
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Date: 11/29/2009 5:21:00 PM
nicley penned, cool!
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Date: 11/29/2009 5:06:00 PM
Hey this is just awesome Raul !! Got us right in there with it.! I think some of that misty gore spray hit me. Feel like changin' my shirt! The last paragraph really takes it home. Wonderful. enjoyed much. -Robert
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Date: 11/29/2009 4:51:00 PM
Damn killer..... Serpents in the sky, attentive attention, aggressive attacks resonate.... I could go on and on... There are so many.... EXCELLENT my friend......:JP}
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