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Blood on the Saddle

Roy Jerden Avatar Roy Jerden - LIFETIME Premium Member Roy Jerden - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Blood on the Saddle which was written by poet Roy Jerden. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Blood on the Saddle

We are taking a long horseback ride
On the great continental divide
    They are singing "Mule Train"
    Just like old Frankie Laine
While my poor butt is wailing "Rawhide"

The guide's muscles are trapezoidal 
With ripples and bulges steroidal 
    All the bulges I find 
    Are inside my behind 
And for sure are all hemorrhoidal

I guess I'm a poor city slicker
Of riding I couldn't be sicker
    I would rather be home
    Where no buffalo roam
With sitz bath and plenty of liquor

The trail is finally on the last branch
All the bleeding at last I can stanch
   The guide said there's a hut
   Where he'll tend to my butt
Here at the Brokeback Mountain Dude Ranch

July 13, 2014

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  1. Date: 1/5/2015 12:41:00 AM
    You are a true comedian Roy. I had giggle after giggle here but mmm... the next verse might have been interesting. Thanks Roy Lindsay

    Jerden Avatar Roy Jerden
    Date: 1/5/2015 1:46:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks! If you like funny poems check out this one. The dialect might not resonate with an Aussie, but I think you have rednecks, too, based on what I have seen and people I have met.
  1. Date: 11/20/2014 8:49:00 PM
    A great poem made up of limericks. I am sending you a Soup mail. Joyce

  1. Date: 8/16/2014 4:58:00 PM
    lol, love it - had to read your limericks : )

  1. Date: 7/30/2014 12:08:00 PM
    What a groaner! Loved it. Congrats on the win... Definitely VERY original.

  1. Date: 7/29/2014 12:48:00 PM
    Roy, Sweet smiles to you, sweet smiles to all.. Congratulations, on making Carolyn's Vacation Humor contest list. LOVE LINDA

  1. Date: 7/27/2014 10:59:00 AM
    Great...... Roy, a funny bumpy ride, Nice win, Mohan

  1. Date: 7/27/2014 8:09:00 AM
    Masterpiece, best of limericks,, that's what u hv given Roy! Hats off to ur wit,, Great write n top win! Huge congrats!

  1. Date: 7/27/2014 6:28:00 AM
    Great winner! maybe wasn't such a great vacation, well done!

  1. Date: 7/27/2014 12:42:00 AM
    Congratulation on your win with this fine funny string of Limerick, Roy

  1. Date: 7/26/2014 9:02:00 PM
    Roy, this is where you shine my friend.. All your limericks are the bomb!

  1. Date: 7/26/2014 6:02:00 PM
    Started off with a bang....but love all four limericks, Roy! Congrats on a worthy top win. // paul

  1. Date: 7/26/2014 4:51:00 PM
    A triple limerick huh? You Rock Roy! LOVE the last line...Don't know what a sitz bath is but I would surely like to get sitzed sometime (Preferably by a member of the opposite sex) As for the liquor? Southern Comfort on the rocks if you please...

  1. Date: 7/26/2014 3:46:00 PM
    congratulations on your big win with your funny poem. Love Joyce

  1. Date: 7/26/2014 1:51:00 PM
    I remember this one. It's hilarious and probably the funniest of them all. Congrats, and well deserved.

  1. Date: 7/26/2014 1:32:00 PM
    Way to go with this great winning work..Congrats...Sara

  1. Date: 7/26/2014 12:20:00 PM
    Roy, I have an old limerick - A "Brush" with Horror. Similar message.

  1. Date: 7/26/2014 12:12:00 PM
    Both endings ("ending" being my own little pun! :) are so darn funny Roy.....!! Great piece of humor !!! Thanks for the laugh! And a big "pile" of congrats !!! LOL !

  1. Date: 7/26/2014 12:05:00 PM
    Hehehehehe - thanks for the great humor! I so very much enjoyed reading this cleverly written piece. Congratulations on a well-deserved TOP win!

  1. Date: 7/26/2014 11:29:00 AM
    Awesome humor, Roy. You are very talented. Congratulations on your first-place win! If you send me your address, I will send you a prize. Thank you for entering the contest! Your fan, Carolyn

  1. Date: 7/26/2014 11:24:00 AM
    Very nice Roy... Congratulations on your top win in the contest... Verlena