Anymore

I thought I had my way, I thought this time it'd turn around, I had a lack of motivation, my self-esteem had hit the ground, But I stood up one day and thought "I'm changing for the good" Not just for me but for those that doubted that I could I'd say I'm quite out of whack, some call it insane, Is it all that crazy using both sides of your brain? Self-medication is always there to watch me burn, The anxious feeling that I get anticipating my next turn, my jealously of "real life" is nothing short of sad but this reality created hasn't treated me that bad I'm sure I'll wake up anytime now, lift myself up off the floor, because this is not a first, I've lost who I am before... I won't lose me anymore.