"a.D.D."

These are just some random thoughts that I guess I still have of you, of us, of me, of we. How you use to call me out of the blue saying, you just needed your daily fix of me. What happened to the times when we just couldn't get enough of each other and being apart only justified how much we longed to be together? "If you had a choice between beauty or brains, what would you choose?" 'I hate hypothetical questions. Why can't I have both?' I always wanted to be pretty and I studied trying to be smart. "How come you never call me?" 'Why does it matter,who calls whom as long as we talk? 'You can call me whenever you want, because I always want to talk to you.' Remembering times we would be on the phone without talking, just content to hear the other breathe. It use to compensate for us being apart yet it never did satisfy our loneliness. Until we just got tired of hurting and saying the words "I miss you." Because if you stop saying it, then maybe you would stop feeling it and then maybe it wouldn't hurt so much anymore. How can one person's view of beauty be another person's view of disgust? Does the eye of the beholder differ that immensely, that your own beliefs, you no longer trust? I guess I knew it was over when you would be sitting right next to me and I still felt all alone, neither of us knowing what to say. I hate words at times, and the fact we need to speak to communicate. These are just some random thoughts that I guess I still have of you, of us, of me, of we....