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Natural Theology

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Written by Rudyard Kipling

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  Primitive
I ate my fill of a whale that died
 And stranded after a month at sea.
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There is a pain in my inside.
Why have the Gods afflicted me? Ow! I am purged till I am a wraith! Wow! I am sick till I cannot see! What is the sense of Religion and Faith : Look how the Gods have afflicted me! Pagan How can the skin of rat or mouse hold Anything more than a harmless flea?.
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The burning plague has taken my household.
Why have my Gods afflicted me? All my kith and kin are deceased, Though they were as good as good could be, I will out and batter the family priest, Because my Gods have afflicted me! Medi/Eval My privy and well drain into each other After the custom of Christendie.
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Fevers and fluxes are wasting my mother.
Why has the Lord afflicted me? The Saints are helpless for all I offer-- So are the clergy I used to fee.
Henceforward I keep my cash in my coffer, Because the Lord has afflicted me.
Material I run eight hundred hens to the acre They die by dozens mysteriously.
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I am more than doubtful concerning my Maker, Why has the Lord afflicted me? What a return for all my endeavour-- Not to mention the L.
S.
D! I am an atheist now and for ever, Because this God has afflicted me! Progressive Money spent on an Army or Fleet Is homicidal lunacy.
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My son has been killed in the Mons retreat, Why is the Lord afflicting me? Why are murder, pillage and arson And rape allowed by the Deity? I will write to the Times, deriding our parson Because my God has afflicted me.
Chorus We had a kettle: we let it leak: Our not repairing it made it worse.
We haven't had any tea for a week.
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The bottom is out of the Universe! Conclusion This was none of the good Lord's pleasure, For the Spirit He breathed in Man is free; But what comes after is measure for measure, And not a God that afflicteth thee.
As was the sowing so the reaping Is now and evermore shall be.
Thou art delivered to thine own keeping.
Only Thyself hath afflicted thee!


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